


Blinking Lights

by acciowho, FlyingPug, mydangergays, OliveTheHobbit



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: A.I. Pepper Potts - Freeform, Endgame Fix-It, Father-Son Dynamics, Hidding Things From Your Loved Ones, Iron Dad, Multi, New Asgard, Of Age Spideypool, Pepper Potts is gone, Pepper is May and Ben's niece, Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Secret Superheroing, Secrets, Stony then Stucky and IronStrange, Super Family (Sort of?), Trans Male Character, Trans Peter Parker, Wade and Peter are bros before Peter grows up and shiz, Wanda is too powerful for her own good, Young Avengers team as little kids, cause of course he would say them, spider son, transphobic slurs said by flash thompson
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-02-16 16:02:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18694756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acciowho/pseuds/acciowho, https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingPug/pseuds/FlyingPug, https://archiveofourown.org/users/mydangergays/pseuds/mydangergays, https://archiveofourown.org/users/OliveTheHobbit/pseuds/OliveTheHobbit
Summary: The passage of the years following Tony Stark's life as Iron Man, after his wife died during the childbirth of his kid.The passage of the years following young Peter Parker's life, growing up as a trans kid with spider powers, raised by his maternal aunt and uncle, after his mysterious dad left.





	1. 2011

**Author's Note:**

> I had a lot of feelings before and after endgame, so here we are
> 
> I will post quite regularly (I hope!) so hang out with me and my friends
> 
> I swear to god the end of this fic is just going to be a lot of self-indulgent fluff.
> 
> So, yeah! I hope y'all enjoy it!

**2011**  
  
He couldn't breathe. He couldn’t think.  
  
His breath tasted like strong alcohol and his hands were shaking.  
  
He looked over his shoulder, to his bed, where a dark-haired woman was sleeping, naked.  
  
He was naked too, of course, and he was cold. So cold, too cold.  
  
He blinked, and the woman in his bed was now a dark-skinned Asian, wearing blue lingerie, snoring gently.  
  
Another blink and there was a tall, strong black guy, hugging his pillow, fast asleep.  
  
He stood up, and ran his hands through his face, feeling the stubs of his beard, the sunken of his eyes and how dry and disgusting everything felt.  
  
He looked to the bed again, and there was a blonde girl.  
  
Not exactly blonde, more of strawberry ginger. Covered in a white nightgown, smiling and waiting for him.  
  
Her body wasn't like the others, all voluptuous or muscular or skinny or plastic. She was naturally round around the stomach, her hands slowly caressing the little bundle of joy that vigorously kicked her from the inside.  
  
“Mr. Stark, your baby doesn't let me sleep!” she would argue, smiling at him, trying to change positions.  
  
He would hold her and kiss her head and kiss the top of her belly and whisper, in a fake angry voice, telling the little stud to go to sleep already.  
  
She would kiss him in the lips, and that would be the most perfect thing ever.  
  
He was happy, he was hers, and she was his, and they were having a baby.  
  
It made… It made his heart beat. Ache.  
  
But he would blink again, and open his eyes, and she wouldn't be there.  
  
His bed was now empty, and he was now alone, as he always was, and it was midday and he had work to do.  
  
And the arc reactor in his chest would still be there, where his heart was supposed to be, where it was, 11 years ago.  
  
  
…  
  
  
11  years ago, on a hot summer day, Virginia Stark was giving birth to her first kid.  
  
On the waiting hall of the Maternity aisle, her husband, the famous millionaire, owner of the Stark industries, genius, playboy and philanthropist, was nothing more than a man. A man, anxious, nervous, excited with the perspective of his future.  
  
A baby. He never thought he would be able to settle down with a single woman. He never thought he would be a father.  
  
He had a bad experience with those. His father was a cold, uncaring, self-centered man, that never really loved him, by his standards. Pepper's father was an absent man that flew away when she was young, leaving her only fatherly figure to be her uncle.  
  
Tony was afraid of being a bad father. He was a bad boyfriend before, a bad boss, a bad human being if he was honest. And now… Now Tony was terrified.  
  
“You’re going to be fine” said Ben Parker, once. He was Pepper’s uncle, and the perfect dad existent in child books. Ironically, he and his adorable wife, May, never had biological children.  
  
Tony aspired to be like him. Moral, ethical, caring husband and friend. There the whole time, hand on his shoulder, chatting, trying to make the wait smaller.  
  
But it never did. And the anxiety never got paid off with happiness and baby giggles.  
  
Instead, a doctor came to give the news.  
  
…  
  
How do you breathe, when one of your lungs stop existing? How do you live, when half of you is dead?  
  
  
_Virginia ‘Pepper’ Stark, née Potts, died of complications during childbirth on the 10th of August of 2001._  
  
…  
  
The baby had Pepper's hair color.  
  
It was subtle, it's hair hidden under a red bonnet. And it had Tony's nose.  
  
And it cried a lot. So, so much, for so many things. For feeding, for changing, all that thing did was crying.  
  
But it could cry, and Tony couldn't.  
  
Tony had to keep his face stern, act as the father of an orphan-of-mother kid.  
  
Oh, screw that baby.  
  
The baby barely knew Pepper. It had lost nothing.  
  
But Tony… Tony lost everything.  
  
  
He felt like he was losing his mind, those three days.  
  
It all happened in a hurry. In a blink, he was at Pepper's funeral, crying his unspeakable loss. On other, he was there, at the little nursery, listening to Aunt May’s chat with the housekeeper that would take care of the baby.  
  
And he was so annoyed at the baby’s cry. And at the chat. And at everything, all of that sound, all of that colors, that felt like nails on a chalkboard in all of his senses.  
  
  
He told them to go away. To take the baby, register the baby under their name, he would give all the money they wanted, they needed, but they had to go away. Now.  
  
…  
  
_Paige May Parker, born on the 10th of August of 2001, NY. The female child of Anthony Edward Stark and Virginia Stark. Custody was given to maternal great-uncle and aunt, Benjamin Parker and May Parker._  
  
…  
  
Peter Parker was a kid like every other kid.  
  
He liked to play in his neighborhood, he liked to watch TV and was wishing for a videogame on his birthday.  
  
The fact that he was an orphan was not exactly common, but he always dealt ok with it. After all, he had his wonderful aunt May, and his amazing uncle Ben. He didn't need a mom and a dad when he had them.  
  
Peter knew only a little about his mother. He knew she was called Virginia, Gina by some family members, and she was smart and worked at a huge company once.  
  
Peter knew nothing about his father. But, well, there was probably a reason behind that, considering how honest his uncles were.  
  
Ok, Peter had a few uncommon things, but the most uncommon through most eyes was that Peter was not born a boy, per se.  
  
He was a boy, he was always very much a boy, but his genitals said something different. Luckily he was able to talk to May and Ben while growing up, and one day he finally found the correct words for his feelings.  
  
Transgender. Gender dysphoria.  
  
His transition happened in a simple way. His hair was already short, his clothes were already from the boy's session, he only started to introduce himself as Peter, the Parkers nephew.  
  
And it was all fine.  
  
Ok, there were some stupid boys that didn't allow him to play with them cause he ‘didn't have a pee-pee, so you're not a real boy’, but most of the time, everything was alright.  
  
And on that day, things were more than alright.  
  
He was going to the Stark Expo and he was so excited!  
  
Peter always had a love for science. Even when he was a little kid, playing with his homemade vulcan, and now when he took some extra classes with high schoolers, physics, chemistry. Everything that explained the universe rules to him, so he could dream of bending them.  
  
So, going to the convention that had the same desire as him, seeing all of those projects for innovation, catching a glimpse of the future.  
  
It was too much for his tiny heart.  
  
But there he was, with his aunt and uncle.  
  
He had acquired in the previous day his most precious possessions of his 10-year-old self. An Iron Man helmet and gloves (that lit up! Just like the real ones!) and an autograph from Tony Stark himself!  
  
Peter Parker, as basically every child his age, was completely crazy about the Iron Man. Gosh! It was so cool that a real-life superhero was there, saving their lives, protecting them.  
  
In Peter's last birthday, when he blew his candle, he wished to become a superhero someday. He could be the Smart Boy, the Diamond Boy… Anything.  
  
He just wanted to help people. Like his Uncle Ben did, driving around the city, giving food for the ones that needed and working on voluntary organizations. Peter always helped him, but he wanted to do even more.  
  
So, there, in the Stark Expo, seeing those extra iron suits, Peter just wished he could wear one of them.  
  
And be like Mr. Stark.  
  
…  
  
May Parker was not happy, taking Peter to that exposition.  
  
She talked about it with Ben, previously. About how confusing it could be, taking the boy to his father’s company exposition.  
  
She never knew how Tony could react to it. Would he recognize Peter? Of course not. The last time he saw him, he was just a little drooling baby.  
  
They sent pictures to Tony. When he was 1, 2, 3 and 4. And letters.  
  
They stopped when they noticed the man wasn't reading them. He was too busy, selling goddamn guns!  
  
It was a shock when that man revealed himself to be Iron Man. By then, May barely believed he had any good inside his soul, despite Ben's claims that ‘Pepper fell in love with him, so he can't be so bad.’  
  
It was scary, to see how much Peter looked like him sometimes.  
  
Yes, he was sweet like Pepper. He was determined, but sensitive, and could handle pressure like no one. But he also had a reckless vein, some sort of feeling that he could do anything, that he was better than most, being so smart.  
  
It was hard to cut down some of those behaviors from the boy, but Ben, God bless him, was doing his best.  
  
It didn't stop Peter from running from them, while in that exposition, and returning only 15 minutes later, having spent his whole birthday gift money in official toy replicas of Iron Man's mask and gloves, and got even an autograph from Tony!  
  
It made May so angry and so scared. They met. They saw each other. And she didn't know how to deal with it.  
  
So, from that moment, May held Peter's hand during every second, afraid of him knowing too much.  
  
Her biggest fear was to think of Peter ever knowing his father abandoned him. He was such a good kid, he didn't deserve Tony Stark as his father. Even if he was Iron Man.  
  
But she couldn't stop smiling at that kid, playing a superhero, blasting his ‘light beams’ at Ben before dinner.  
  
…  
  
He couldn't breathe. He couldn’t think.  
  
His breath tasted like the bubblegum he was chewing earlier, to help with his anxiety.  
  
He looked slightly over his shoulder, where the armored person was. All metally, in red and yellow, chest, hand, everything glowing. And then, looked back to the Hammer Drone in front of him.  
  
He was wearing armor too. And suddenly, he wasn't afraid.  
  
It wasn't a smart decision. It was pure and simple nonsense. But it was rushing on Peter's veins. He held his hand up, the light on his palm shining.  
   
He blinked, and the Drone was blasted off by Iron Man. Iron Man saved him.  
  
“Nice work, kid” he said, flying away.  
  
Another blink and his aunt May was hugging him, saying she had been screaming his name for so much time, afraid anything had happened to him.  
  
He got off of the hug and took off his mask, running his hands through his face, feeling the wet of his tears, the warmth of his excitement and how unreal everything felt.  
  
He looked up to his mask again. Wow.  
  
“We're going back home. And you're never leaving my side again. Are you listening? I screamed your name so much…” May was crying.  
  
But Peter was so far away from there. Iron Man had said ‘nice work, kid’ to him. Good job on what? Distracting the Drone?  
  
Yeah, it was probably it. Damn. Peter had helped Tony Stark on something. Wow.  
  
He couldn’t contain his happiness in that small body. He was bursting by himself in the car on the way back home.  
  
“I don't think I will ever sleep again!” he screamed, kicking the back of the shotgun seat, that was empty that night.  
  
“Peter, calm down already.”  
  
But Peter was happy and he felt complete. A real-life superhero knew his name.  
  
He… He could be one someday. He felt it in his bones.  
  
And Peter was, right there, a completely happy kid, telling the story, again and again, while eating pizza with uncle Ben.  
  
  
But then Peter would blink, someday, and uncle Ben would be gone.  
  
Cause the Iron Man couldn't protect everyone every time. Just like Captain America, Thor, Hulk… Everyone. They just had too many invasive aliens to fight with.  
  
And Peter would now be alone, hanging from his ceiling, with powers he gained by accident, fulfilling his self-proclaimed prophecy. Of being a superhero. One that could’ve saved his uncle Ben, he added.  
  
And with new powers and responsibilities, Peter tried to fill in his heart a hole that was open since uncle Ben died, a hole the was filled 15 years ago.  
  
  
  
  
The father role.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
And then, one day, Tony Stark knocked on his door.


	2. 2012

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Note for Stucky shippers: Bear with the Stony, will y'all?)
> 
> I just finished writing the 4th chapter and I'm tired and crying and listening to Declan McKenna. Is that the dream writer life?
> 
> I have college classes tomorrow and it's almost 2 am. Please admire my effort ok uwu
> 
> SO! Chapter is kind of blocky, but dude... I really don't like Iron Man 3, so I tried to rush on it. I guess I'd do it even if I liked it, because I need to focus on the right stuff. Still, I liked the chapter, hope you also do it!

**2012**

 

Tony was feeling odd.

 

To begging with, Tony wasn't drunk. But he wasn't sober either.

 

It was weird. A warm, thick sensation that engulfed him. He felt like smiling, like falling asleep, and life felt… Good.

 

Like it hadn't in a long, long time.

 

He wasn't a stranger to this feeling. He just… Never expected to feel it again.

 

He rolled in the bed, looking over his shoulder.

 

There was a man, deep in his sleep. 

 

Strong, blonde, in full patriotic glory, there was Steve Rogers.

 

It was… So weird, in Tony’s head that it somehow happened.

 

Everything between them clashed. Different ways of seeing the world, personalities that seemed like water and wine, even different goals.

 

But still, he was there.

 

If you asked Tony who started it, he couldn't point it. It was a blink, and they were kissing, mid-fight.

 

It was so comic seeing Steve's cheeks turn red, his mouth open again and again, trying to excuse his actions. Tony, on the other hand, just shut him up again, with his mouth.

 

It was a mess, but they never seemed to really break from that mess. It was a secret, too, cause it was nobody's business but theirs.

 

In that night, they were dizzy with some cocktails that Tony made, and was in a good mood. They watched some stupid old ass movie on the TV and ate pizza and fucked on the couch.

 

Steve never called it that. Since it happened for the first time, that strong, tall, adult man, blushing and whispering sweet things. He called it sleeping together, even though they rarely slept after it. Especially when they weren't standing. He called it making love but Tony was never able to crack the L word.

 

He only said it to Pepper, too long ago. Everything else was fucking, screwing. He… He didn't really feel like that was what he was doing with Steve, but he could pretend.

 

The bed was warm, his heart was warm, his skin was warm, everything was warm and he needed a glass of water.

 

He put on his robes and walked barefoot to the kitchen.

 

The tower was quiet this deep in the night, and the floor tiles were cold and perfect.

 

He thought about a lot of things while he drank the water. About himself. About his role as Iron Man. About the Avengers and the friends he made.

 

About Steve, sleeping in his bed.

 

He thought about his past, and his present, and even glimpsed on his future.

 

He never felt like he did with Pepper before Steve. It was different, completely different, and no one could ever replace her, but…

 

Those feelings were there, and they were strong, burning down his chest.

  
  


He thought about Paige when the last drop of water touched his tongue. She was 13 now, right? Or something like that?

 

He hoped she was happy.

  
  
  


He came back to bed, hoping to see his… To see Steve still asleep. That was not the case.

 

The man was standing up, finding his underwear like the prude he was.

 

“Are you thirsty? I can make you some juice. I saw you bought oranges earlier.”

 

“Yeah.” Steve nodded. “Thought you needed a bit of vitamin c.”

 

“J.A.R.V.I.S  would tell me if it were the case” Tony said while walking and standing close to the blonde man, touching his still naked arms. “Let's go back to bed?”

 

“I… Wanted to take some air.”

 

Tony just nodded. “I can go with you.”

 

“No. It's fine. Go back to sleep. It's okay.”

 

Steve kissed his cheek and left the room a minute later.

 

But Tony couldn't do the same.

 

His mind was running, but he wasn't solving any math or physics problems. No, it was his life, that laid in front of him waiting for him to set it up.

 

If Pepper were alive, everything would be so much easier.

  
  


But she wasn't. And he was hooking up with Captain America.

 

Fuck.

  
  


He kept thinking about it ‘till Steve came back.

 

It was a surprise for the blonde, that the billionaire genius was still awake. But he was and started spewing words when he saw him.

 

“We could be together.”

 

“What?”

 

“We could… Date. Or just, live together, if you want. It doesn't need to be a public thing, but it can be if you want it to. I… I want it. For us. To be together.”

 

And then it was time for Steve to blurt.

 

“I’m moving to Washington D.C. tomorrow.”

 

Tony didn't overreact. He could, but he didn't.

 

He just… Kept staring at Steve’s blue eyes. Gosh, how they made him feel… Weird.

 

Good.

 

“We can still… See each other. I won't be on California all the time.” he swallowed nothing. “And we can, I don't know. Spend weekends together. You can have your life and I can have mine and… This… Doesn't have to change.”

 

“Yeah. It doesn't.”

 

Steve wasn't sounding good.

 

“But it will, won't it?”

 

They spoke no more words, cause Steve came back to the bed and started kissing him again.

 

And Tony’s heart was beating, so fast, too fast, that he whispered under his breath.

 

“I love you.”

  
  


He just hoped Steve didn't listen.

 

…

 

Keeping himself busy was the perfect deal. Tony knew it.

 

He spent most of his days on his workshop, thinking, working on improving his powered suits, training them with the help of J.A.R.V.I.S.

 

It was lonely, but he was used to it.

 

It didn’t make it easier in any way, though.

 

He couldn't sleep, and when he did, he was tormented by those visions.

 

He was there again. Out in space. Unable to breathe. Falling.

 

And then he would wake up again, drenched in sweat, shaking, unable to breathe and sometimes, even move.

  
  


Steve helped with it, on the first times.

 

“I've seen it so many times on veterans” he commented once, but Tony just smirked, going back to drinking his coffee.

  
  


He would hug him, and tell him he was fine. He would kiss him and caress his hair, and say that he was ok now.

 

But Steve wasn't there to do all of those things so all Tony could do was resist, as he did to any and everything that faced his way since he was a kid. Try to find a way to adapt, as hard as it could be.

 

…

 

Killian was Pepper’s ex.

 

He mentioned that, once. That little prick.

 

“I was… Very shocked to hear the news. Pepper was an amazing woman.” to which Tony just nodded, teeth clenched. “Tony, what happened to your little girl? I don't think I ever saw any p…”

 

“She died too. I just never informed to the big media. It was too much.”

 

“Oh. I see. That both of them rest in peace.”

 

…

 

Happy was in a coma.

 

It hit Tony in a way he didn't expect it to.

 

Mandarin had to pay. He couldn't lose anyone else he loved like this, easy like this.

 

It was too much for him.

 

…

 

His home was now exploded. In ruins. Great.

 

And he was now an anxious mess on Tennessee.

  
  


At least, he found himself company.

 

Harley Keener was a smart little kid with a dad as shitty as his.

 

Well, with a dad as shitty as he was.

 

But he was smart like he was, and a good kid after all.

  
  


He thought about Paige again.

 

Was she like that boy? How old was her right now?

  
  


It always made him feel bad. And he had enough things making him feel bad.

 

PTSD, those unending flashbacks, the constant fear that he would enter in panic again. Killian.

  
  


He left, wondering if Harley would remember him, 10 years from there. He hoped so.

 

Paige certainly didn't.

 

…

 

He kissed Steve, deeply, before he went to surgery.

 

It was good to see him, his eyes, his face, his lips, his smell.

 

He told him about what he was doing, his new adventures on this brand new century.

 

And Tony told him his adventures. He told him about Harley.

 

He couldn't tell him about Paige.

 

He went to surgery, touching the arc reactor deep in his chest for a moment before falling asleep.

  
  


When he woke up, he had a heart again.

 

…

 

“I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

…

 

“I have to tell you something. About… My past. But I really hope you can listen to me, before judging me.” Tony began. He was wrapped in Steve's arms, on a rainy night.

 

“Go on.”

 

“13 years ago, Pepper and I…”

 

…

 

When Peter completed 13, he started to use puberty blockers.

 

It was expensive, and it hurt him a lot to see his uncle work so much more to sustain the house, the car, and his medical bills.

 

His aunt tried to talk to him, explain that it was ok. Peter needed those meds, and they would do anything to take care of him.

 

But Peter couldn't stop feeling bad about it. If he were normal, none of this would be needed.

 

If his mother were alive, he wouldn't be such a burden to his aunt and uncle. If his dad weren't gone…

 

Peter grabbed a pillow and screamed inside of it, tears bursting and wetting the Iron Man themed pillow coat.

 

He wished he could work already. He wished he were rich like Iron Man so he could pay for everything his uncle needed.

 

But he was just a 13-year-old boy on Queens, and the most exciting thing about himself was his lack of a penis. Great.

 

He closed his eyes and hoped for a better future for them all.

 

…

 

When he was 14, Peter tried to break into aunt May secret box.

 

Peter called it that since he was 5. It was a medium wooden box with peacock pattern fabric covering it. There, she kept all of the things she prohibited him to look at.

 

For solid 4 years now, Peter wondered if there were only sex toys or sensual letters, whatever adults used to reproduce, and didn’t want to know it's contents.

 

But someday, he saw his aunt put some papers inside of it.

 

And yes, he could still see _ things he didn't want to _ , but… It was worth the risk.

 

His curiosity was killing him.

 

Oh, and now he had spider powers.

 

So, he climbed on top of a wardrobe where the box was located and grabbed it with one hand, doing his furry thing to keep it steady.

 

He then sneakily walked to his room and looked at it.

 

Shit. It had a locker? Since when? He swore it hadn't the last time he saw it...

 

“Peter have you seen… Oh my god, what are you doing?”

 

“I'm sorry! I'm sorry!”

 

May's cheeks were red. With embarrassment? Anger? He couldn't tell, as she was screaming.

 

“Peter Benjamin Parker, put this box right where you found it!”

 

“I'm sorry aunt, I was just…”

 

“I don't want to hear excuses! Just do it. Now.”

  
  
  


They talked to him after that night's dinner.

 

“Pete, love. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scream at you. I just… You shouldn't take my box. It is my privacy.”

 

Ben nodded, holding May’s hand.

 

“We know we told you to not have secrets with us. The rule is still valid most of the time. But… Sometimes… There are things that are better like this. Ok?” Ben added.

 

“T-that doesn't mean I have anything important in that box. It's just… My things. Personal things. And maybe someday I, well, I may even show you but… You shouldn't just go around taking people's things. Would you like if I broke up into your room whenever your door is closed and… Catch you doing something embarrassing?”

 

Most teens would think about masturbation. Some teens would think about something embarrassing about transitioning, like putting on your packer or tucking.

 

Peter thought about all of the ridiculous tests that he made about his powers. Like if he could stay glued to the ceiling if he was eating or drinking something. And, was he willing to eat a fly now that he was part spider?

 

But, he got the message. He had a secret himself. An important secret.

 

He kissed his uncle and aunt good night and went upstairs to another part of his secret.

 

Working, till 3 am, on his web-shooters project.

 

…

 

“I want to talk to Peter.” Tony Stark said, to May Parker.

 

The boy was right there. On the stairs, right there. Holding his breath, hands sweating.

 

What did Iron Man want with him?

 

“Now? After all those years?” May said, in a crying voice. Her lips were trembling.

 

But Tony said nothing more. He just asked where Peter was.

 

And aunt May just called him

 

“Peter, dear. Are you in your room? There is someone who wants to talk to you.”

 

Peter's heart was racing. He only answered.

 

“Yes… I am… I'll be waiting there.”

  
  


He entered his room, sat on his bed, and felt, deep inside his stomach, that he was about to know the contents of the peacock patterned box.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! Hope the next comes as soon as this one did. Again, comments, kuddos and... Everything is very much appreciated thank you so much if you already commented or are supporting me on writing this. I'm completely in love with this fic.


	3. 2014

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting today 'cause it's my friend Day (@mydangergays) birthday. He is awesome, he deserves the best and if everyone can tell him a 'happy birthday Day!' on the comments, I will be eternally grateful and he will be so so happy!

**2014**

 

Steve came to meet Tony after a mission.

 

He was… Different. But Tony could understand.

 

Fury was dead. 

 

And Steve lost his faith in S.H.I.E.L.D. In a lot of things, if Tony was understanding it right.

 

And, fuck, Tony wanted to ask so much more. There were a lot of blurry things in Steve’s speech, but…

 

But he didn't.

 

‘Cause he was an invasive bastard all the time, but right now… There was so much pain on Steve’s eyes.

 

He just stood there. And listened.

 

And cuddled Steve when he wanted to. Needed to.

 

They have been together for two years now. It was more than Tony could ever conceive their relationship to last. Yes, they fought a lot, yes, they had some problems.

 

But they were still there. Together.

 

…

 

He bought Steve a ring.

 

The blond was an old fashioned man, and he guessed two years was a long time.

 

So he set up a dinner, lit up some candles, and kept the band on his pocket.

 

And he… Waited.

 

For his courage to come up. For a moment to open up.

 

And all he could see was Steve's smile. His sky blue eyes.

 

And he was shaking, and he couldn't speak.

 

But he closed his eyes and thought about Pepper. How she smiled and cried when he proposed to her.

 

He remembered how she told him “It was about time”. And then kissed him, after saying the most beautiful yes.

 

He wanted to see that face in Steve. Hear that in his voice.

 

So he took a deep breath, and opened his mouth, and then, the velvet box.

 

…

 

“I got to be honest with you. I never thought this would happen.” Steve said, when they were cuddling, right before bed.

 

The heavy ring in his finger was gold as his locks and had small sapphires, blue as his eyes in its extension.

 

“That would not be the first time someone said that.” Tony let a little laugh go, but it suddenly fell down heavy in the room, and in his chest.

 

He knew Pepper would want him to move on. He would say the same to her if the situation were the opposite.

 

But still.

 

He kept quiet for a bit. For a long. For a too long.

 

But Steve got his hand, kissed it and said, looking deep into Tony's eyes.

 

“I know how you feel. And it's okay. I…” Steve had a little pause. “I met Peggy again.”

 

Tony readjusted himself on the bed. “Peggy Carter? The girl you…”

 

Steve nodded. “Yeah. I… Had a time revisiting my past this few months. She was… Old. But beautiful. She moved on, got married.”

 

Tony let that sink down. “And how do you feel?”

 

“I feel… Like we should do the same. It's what they would want us to do. And… We deserve to be happy, don't we?”

 

Tony kissed Steve again, and he was okay with the idea of doing it, again and again for the rest of their lives until some enemy killed them inevitably.

 

But right now, none of this mattered. ‘Cause Iron Man obviously wasn't getting married to Captain America.

 

But Tony Stark was going to marry Steve Rogers.

 

...

 

Tony didn't use to cook, but he could, and that’s what he was doing.

 

After all, what kind of husband would he be if he didn't make lunch for his love?

 

Steve reading the newspaper, like the old guy he was, and eavesdropping the TV, while Tony finished the guacamole that would accompany the vegetable patties he was finishing. It apparently did match, J.A.R.V.I.S found the recipe online.

 

He sat down with Steve and pushed him the plate.

 

“Eat. Does it taste good?” he got one himself.

 

Steve didn't take much time to chew and taste the sandwich. He gave good feedback. He always did, that guy.

 

“Hmm. Yeah. I mean, it's exotic, isn't it?” said Tony, sucking the faint humidity of the pattie from his finger, while Steve glanced the TV.

 

“Oh, this school. Midtown School of Science and Technology. My educational videos were promoted there.” Steve said, with a voice that didn't have nearly the amount of shame that it should. Actually, he was proud.

 

Tony didn't care much about the TV. Yes, there were kids there, winning some kind of middle school science competition or something. Nothing too special.

 

But Steve asked him, out of nowhere.

 

“How would you feel, if one of those kids were Paige?”

 

It made Tony stop everything he was doing, cause he forgot that name so easily. It always made him feel pain. Even if he wasn't her dad properly, he still… Produced her.

 

If life were different, she would be there, eating his stupid patties.

 

Tony took a deep breath before Steve could start to apologize, as he always did, and looked to the TV.

 

There were 10 kids smiling, holding a trophy and giving a small interview.

 

He looked at the kids quickly and shrugged his shoulders.

 

“She is not one of those. The only girl here is black.” he pointed, and then turned off the TV.

 

...

 

They never told the Avengers about them. Well, Natasha got it somehow, because of feminine intuition or whatever that was. And she told Barton of course. But it was it. A secret.

 

Or, at least, an omission.

 

Privacy.

 

They still had their private lives. They still had their missions and projects.

 

They still had their secrets.

 

But it was like a wise man said once, around the same time, in the same country, lives apart, to his young nephew.

 

_ Some secrecy is needed sometimes. _

 

_ Needed? _

 

_ Hmm. _

 

…

 

**2015**

 

It was good to work together again, and Tony never thought he would feel like that. That teamwork would suit him.

 

But now, there they were, hunting down HYDRA, fighting those who meant harm, each one in their own way of doing so.

 

It was good to bicker with Steve, join Bruce's train of thought and just… Appreciate how strong and powerful his teammates were. Friends?

 

Yeah. Friends.

 

And everything was going fairly well in their mission in Sokovia, rescuing Loki's scepter that was being used for human empowering. 

 

Until that, of course.

  
  
  
  


Tony really hoped it was a lie.

 

Just a nightmare, something that his twisted abused imagination produced.

 

Everyone was dead. Every single one of his friends had fallen. He barely could breathe. 

 

Steve was dying.

 

He held his hand, while agonizing, and pleaded.

 

“You could have… Saved us.”

 

There was a rip on his glove, and his ring was dirty with blood.

 

He looked at it. And then back at Steve. And he was gone.

 

_ Why didn't you do more? _

 

Then, there was the Chitauri coming down to Earth. So many, too many.

 

And he couldn't do anything.

  
  
  


He raised his hand. He grabbed the scepter, silently pleading that none of that was real.

 

…

 

It was real enough to make him work. To make a mistake.

 

He had good intentions. The best intentions.

 

After three days of intense work,  he and Bruce had… Well. A bit of success.

 

And he had a good night.

 

Natasha and Bruce were obviously flirting. Clint was finally in good health, everyone was drinking and Steve was looking so hot that Tony regretted making a room for everyone in the Tower ‘cause he couldn't enjoy every single one of those rooms with Steve.

 

Luckily he could burn all of the sexual frustration trying to lift Thor’s hammer.

 

It was… Ridiculously impossible.

 

That's why he obviously didn’t believe when, minutes later, Steve whispered to him.

 

“Ton… I guess I’m worthy.”

 

“What?”

 

“I… I didn’t want to make Thor feel weird, but I’m pretty sure I can lift that hammer.”

 

Tony laughed. Of course, he did. But Steve did too. 

 

And it was a good night.

 

Until, of course…

 

Ultron.

  
  


Secrets, huh.

 

…

 

It hurt, being responsible for so many things.

 

Even if he gave life to J.A.R.V.I.S… Vision, because of it.

 

One of his bombs killed Wanda and Pietro’s parents. He hid Ultron from Steve and the rest of the Avengers, he created Ultron, because he was so afraid.

 

Pietro was also dead. And Novi Grad…

  
  


He left the Avengers.

 

…

 

“I have to work,” said Steve. 

 

‘Cause he did.

 

He would pack his clothes, kiss Tony goodbye, and leave.

 

He had to save the world Tony failed so many times to protect.

  
  


At least, he came back every time.

 

It was more than Tony could ask for, to be honest.

 

…

 

At least, now Tony had a lot of free time.

 

Free time to think about everything that happened. Reassess his life, some would say.

 

And he thought about Paige.

 

Maybe it was his age, coming and settling inside of him paternity feelings he had abandoned long, long ago.

 

Maybe it was because he saw Clint and his kids.

  
  


Maybe it was because he missed Steve, and felt alone now that things were…

 

Like that.

  
  
  
  


He decided it, simply, in the middle of a business meeting.

  
  
  


He stood up and simply told Happy that he needed to meet someone way more important.

 

…

 

Tony Stark was in his room, Peter freaked out.

 

The Iron Man was in his room, Peter freaked out even more.

 

And oh my god how shitty was his room.

 

A full mess of clothes, and books, and his stupid mechanic junk.

 

But Tony apparently didn’t care. He sat on a chair, across his bed, where Peter had nervously sat at, and just… Stared.

 

And so many things ran through Peter’s mind. That he was seeing how poor he looked in his thrift store clothes. How his hair was greasy, and there were pimples on his forehead and…

 

Maybe he was seeing that Peter was trans. Some people say they could, didn’t they?

 

Maybe he was there, cloaking him. And then Peter’s palms started sweating, and his breath became erratic.

 

What was that man doing there?

 

…

 

Tony had to stop for some time, to just look at him.

 

Regardless of how strange it would seem.

 

That…  _ Boy _ … Gosh, he was a boy. It was quite a surprise when he knew, but it didn’t change anything in his mind.

 

To be fair, it made more sense, somehow.

 

His son.

 

Shit.

 

He looked like him. He looked like Pepper. He looked a lot like him when he was his age.

 

He was smart, and had wonderful grades, and was a good boy. Always helping others, as Ben Parker did. He had been a great father for Peter. A better one than he would ever be.

 

But still, Tony was there. Meeting him.

 

“Hi, Peter. You probably know who I am, don’t you?”

 

The boy nodded. “I’ve met you before. When… When I was young I was at a Stark Expo and… I was the boy in the Iron Man mask… I don’t know if you remember…”

 

“The drones.”

 

“Yeah, the drones.” Peter rubbed his hands, anxiously. “So… Mr. Stark… May I ask… Why are you here?”

 

And Tony couldn’t say it.

 

Tony just… Couldn’t.

 

His own hands were shaking.

 

What was he fearing? Rejection? Well, he rejected the boy before, so it was nothing but fair.

  
  


There was a knock on the door, and a runny-nosed May opened it, to give Peter a chest patterned with little peacocks. She also gave him a key.

 

“What’s this?” Tony asked the boy, but the kid was completely amazed by himself.

 

“It’s aunt May secret… Well. I guess not secret anymore…” he didn’t complete, only opened the box.

 

Tony came closer, to see.

 

…

 

The first pictures showed Peter as a little kid.

 

When he was still gullible enough to be forced into a dress. When his hair was still long and people still called him all the wrong things. 

 

Quickly, he pulled those out and hid behind his back, so Mr. Stark couldn’t see.

 

There was another picture there.

 

A little baby, all wrapped up in red, with a younger aunt May and an alive uncle Ben, holding him with love, so much love.

 

Peter felt tears pooling in his eyes.

 

There was another picture.

 

A woman, a girl, in a turtleneck. And she was beautiful. And she looked like Peter.

 

Another one, she was wearing a fake leather coat and smiling when someone took the picture.

 

Another one, and now she was an adult. She looked like the successful lady Peter knew she was. And she looked happy.

 

Behind her, there was a Stark Industries logo.

  
  


Peter senses started tingling. Was it his spider ones? Was it his anxiety, a premonition?

 

His heart was racing.

  
  


On the next photo, she was not alone.

 

There was a man by her side, and they were looking at each other while cutting a wedding cake. She was looking beautiful.

 

And he…

  
  


He was sitting in Peter’s room.

  
  


He took the photo from Peter’s hands, and he was crying as much as Peter was. 

 

He touched the woman on the photo… Pepper… With his fingertips.

 

He let it sit on his lap, dried his cheeks, and looked back at Peter.

  
  


“Hi. I’m… I am...”

 

“My father.”

 

The words came out before Peter registered they did.

 

“Yeah. That. Hi.” Tony offered his hand, for a handshake.

  
  


And Peter jumped into him for a tight hug he waited 15 years for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope y'all liked it! Comments are highly appreciated, especially the ones that say 'happy birthday, day', cause I really love this boy
> 
> I'm loving writing this fic and I'm really happy that you all are liking it too!
> 
> Kisses and see y'all soon


	4. 2015

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! The next chapter is basically ready, but I took a little break for studying and writing on an original book, but it will probably be ready by the end of this day, or tomorrow.
> 
> Anyway! Here it comes my favorite chapter so far. It was good to write and I'm happy with the results.
> 
> Good read!
> 
> (Editing cause I just noticed I was, I don't know, drugged when I posted it the first time? My dear friend sent me corrections. Thank you Simon.)

**2015**

 

Tony just didn't know how to react to that hug.

  
  


He knew… He knew he should expect something like that.

  
  


But… It was weird.

  
  


His heart was full, yes, and his arms were around the kid, but it felt… Different.

  
  


It was too much at once.

  
  


And the only thing he could feel was the last hug he reminded giving his father, when he was younger than Peter was, in a father's day.

  
  


It was cold. It was distant. And that's how Tony felt right now.

  
  


Peter broke the hug, drying his tears and sitting back in his bed.

  
  


It was awkward. It was all so, so awkward.

  
  


“What happened, dad? Why… Why did you?”

  
  


Dad.

  
  


Fuck.

  
  


Tony wanted to leave. Wanted to go back to his apartment, work, go after Steve, something else but that.

  
  


But…

  
  


The boy was looking at him, with those dark eyes that reminded him of his own.

  
  


And he tried to picture himself there. At that age, meeting his father for the first time.

  
  


Fuck, that man…

  
  


He couldn't be like Howard was.

  
  


He took a deep breath and stared at the ground, cause he just couldn’t see those eyes when he told the truth.

  
  


“I couldn't.” he rubbed his forehead. “I couldn't after Pepper died. I… I really didn't…  I didn't mean to leave you behind, I just couldn't do it. Your uncle and aunt… They were so much better at everything, better than I was…”

  
  


“But… Why did you never show up? I… I always wondered about who you were and… Where were you… I tried not to, but it was impossible.” Tony looked at Peter, and he was looking at his own hands.

  
  


“I thought it was better for you. To not know me. The Parkers also thought the same, I suppose. I tried to offer money, to help to raise you but they never accepted. So I thought we were just… Cutting ties.”

  
  


Peter gave a small smile and rubbed his nose. “Aunt May can be a little too proud sometimes.”

  
  


“I know.”

  
  


Peter sighed, and Tony felt a pang. He looked like Pepper doing it. How his shoulders would rise up, and he would lightly shake his hands after. How many times had he seen it in his love, when she was tired after solving his problems, again and again?

  
  


“Why now?”

  
  


‘Cause I miss your mother, and you are what remained from her? Because my husband is away and I feel alone? Because I want to be better than my father? ‘Cause I saw Clint and his children and felt jealous?

  
  


It was all about himself. Not about Peter.

  
  


And he felt guilty, for his fucking selfishness.

  
  


So, he lied.

  
  


“Because I saw you.”

  
  


“You did? When?”

  
  


“You were leaving your school… Midtown Science and Technology… Something, right? You were… Leaving and I was passing by and I… I recognized you. And that felt like a sign. I saw you before, on TV, when you were younger and less…”

  
  


He pointed vaguely at the boy.

  
  


Peter stopped smiling. “Yeah I… I guess you know I'm trans. I… I really hope that is not a problem, dad…”

  
  


That word again. Fuck.

  
  


“No. It’s not, I accept you *.** I'm 100% pro-LGBT and all.” Tony made a little gesture with a fist. “But… Uh… It may be a little weird but… Can you call me something else than… Dad?”

  
  


He waited to see the boy’s reaction.

  
  


The kid blushed.

  
  


“Oh, yeah I mean, of course, we just met. It must be weird I… Uh… Mr. Stark… Is that good?”

  
  


“Uhm. Too formal but better. So… I heard you like science?”

  
  


The boy started telling about his own, mediocre in his opinion, inventions and little experiments he made at school and home. He showed some of the decrepit PC's he improved and after a bit of initial shame, the boy was now sounding excited and even a bit proud.

  
  


And Tony was, too, somehow. The boy had a lot of potential.

  
  


A little chill ran his spine. Was could see himself eventually dying and leaving the industry under the kid’s shoulders.

  
  


Like father like son, they said.

  
  


He listened and talked to Peter for 30 minutes or something, then his aunt came to talk to him.

  
  


“Peter… Is everything alright?”

  
  


“Oh, yeah, me and da… Me and Mr. Stark were talking about evolutionary algorithms… You always complained about now knowing what to say about my nerdy topics… Now I have someone who understands.” Peter smiled. He looked excited.

  
  


May nodded. “Call me if you want… Need anything… But… Uhh… I made some passionfruit mousse and, I know how much you like those. So, wanna come down and eat it?”

  
  


“Yeah, I want but… Mr. Stark and I…”

  
  


“It's okay, kid. You can go down and eat there we… We have a lot of time now.” he patted the boy’s shoulder awkwardly. “We can hang out sometimes. Eat a pizza or ice cream... Have you ever eaten shawarma?…”

  
  


“Can I see your armor? Or your office? You probably have the coolest things there. Machines never seen by most. Inventions that we never dreamt about!”

  
  


“Calm down there kid.” Peter was talking so fast Tony doubted the boy was breathing. “We can do it all. Later. Now, go there and eat that mousse. And do your homework and… Have fun with your friends.”

  
  


Peter smiled and moved like he was going to hug Tony. But stopped. Then, he shook his hand and stood up to leave.

  
  


But he stopped.

  
  


“Uh… Mr. Stark… Can I tell people that… You’re my…”

  
  


“I'd rather you didn't,” Tony said, quickly. “For your safety, of course. I'm still Iron Man, so…”

  
  


Peter's eyes were glistening. “Yeah, you're right.”

  
  


He kissed his aunt's cheek and went downstairs, happy and almost jumpy.

  
  


“He is a good kid” said Tony, to the woman still at the door.

  
  


“The best kid. And I really want to know what are your intentions here. Why now, after all those years?” May had her arms firmly crossed on her chest.

  
  


“I just… Felt like it was the right time. I want to… Be his father, I guess. Hang out, know him better, take him to my apartment on some weekends or something.”

  
  


“That's not all that parenting is.” she frowned her eyebrows.

  
  


“Yes. I know. But it is a beginning, isn't it?” Tony stood up and walked out of the room, standing close to May. “How did he react to Ben's death?”

  
  


“Like every teen. He closed himself in the room, cried a lot, got angry at the world and everything and then… Moved on.”

  
  


Ben's death was an awful surprise to Tony. He liked that man, and to know he was cowardly killed like that…

  
  


“I just want to be here for Peter. That's all.”

  
  


And May opened her mouth to complain, again and again but didn't say anything. She just nodded. “Ok.”

  
  


“Ok.”

  
  


Tony walked through the kitchen to leave, and Peter was there, mouth full of mousse, shaking his hand ‘goodbye’ frantically.

  
  


Tony promised to call back. To come back. So they could start building what they should already have.

  
  


He entered his car, and Happy asked.

  
  


“So, how’s the kid?”

  
  


“Cool. You would like him.”

  
  


“If he’s like you, I doubt it a lot.”

  
  


And Tony smiled, cause, yeah, Peter was, surprisingly, a lot like him.

  
  


…

  
  


He called Steve about meeting Peter.

  
  


He took less than two minutes to explain about his son, but Steve was happy about it.

  
  


“Do you want to meet him?” Tony asked.

  
  


“Are you going to tell about us?” Steve replied.

  
  


And Tony… Wondered.

  
  


It would be the first time he would talk about it to someone. To anyone.

  
  


Not even Happy knew it. Well, of course, he knew, but it was something empirical. Tony never told him about it.

  
  


But Happy was ok with it. ‘Cause Tony told him so many other things.

  
  
  
  


He invited Happy and Peter to get a pizza two weeks later.

  
  


...

  
  


They all met in a nice, small and fairly unknown pizzeria in the middle of Little Italy, and they were all sharing a booth.

  
  


Peter was so excited to meet Steve. He had shaken his hand for a solid minute, saying how he was a huge fan of him, and how cool he was, and Steve was smiling hard.

  
  


He always seemed to like kids. How could he not? Steve was the perfect man™.

  
  


They all sat down on a nice booth and started choosing dishes. Well, at least Tony tried to, but Peter was bombarding Steve about how it was to be frozen in ice, and what was the craziest thing he found out about the future, and how the Avengers were.

  
  


It was funny because Peter always tried to keep it cool, the whole ‘asking the superhero about superheroing’, but apparently he didn't care about doing it with Steve.

  
  


Luckily, Steve was ok with answering.

  
  


They kept talking non-stop until the pizza arrived, and Tony felt suddenly happy that Peter was too busy stuffing his endless talking hole with pizza.

  
  


Then that happened.

  
  


That little, subtle but still so loud gesture, that screamed everything Tony couldn't manage to say.

  
  


Steve, stopping all of his eating to use a napkin to clean a bit of a bit tomato sauce, that had spilled on Tony’s chin.

  
  


Tony smiled briefly to Steve, even while grumping ‘I could've done it myself!’ Then, he looked back to his son and friend, and they were pink. The literal shade of the cartoon panther.

  
  


Happy tried to cover it up with 0 alcohol beer, and Peter tried to fit a whole pizza inside his mouth, apparently, because he started choking.

  
  


“You two…” he asked when finally regaining air, after some firm taps on the back from Hogan.

  
  


“Yes. But…” Tony lift a finger to his lips, in a silence gesture. “We’d rather keep our private lives away from work.”

  
  


“Yeah, yeah, I totally get it. But, wow, that's so cool. I still can't believe I'm dining here with you too. I can't believe you two are my fathers!”

  
  


It was awkward. At least for Tony. That word was weird. At least it was not…

  
  


“I’m happy that I ended up being your step-dad” Steve gave the boy a little pat on the shoulder.

  
  


Yeah, that was way worse.

  
  


But it seemed so natural to Steve. Maybe he was, indeed, the perfect man™. Or maybe he was just too good at hiding things.

  
  


Hiding things.

  
  
  


Tony could still remember how Steve tried to seem chill about his inner turmoil on the regards of his sexuality.

  
  


Tony knew Steve was still understanding his own non-monosexuality. That there were more than just girls in the world that he could be attracted to. Tony had that moment too many years ago when he was 21 and had a threesome with another guy. But Tony could see that, for someone born in 1918, it was completely different.

  
  


But Steve was now in the future, and everything was completely different. Everything was a surprise, everything was turning and twisting everything he knew before. But he kept calm, kept his mind open.

  
  


Tony loved it about him.

  
  


He accepted the love he felt for another man and cheered up when discovered that he could marry the said man. He accepted that this man had a kid that was born female but grew up to be a boy. He accepted that he was now, somehow, step-father of this kid he just met.

  
  


Steve was amazing. And he deserved all the praise he got. Even from the pretty and young girls and boys that, sometimes, would make Tony’s blood boil.

  
  


And they all cheered, near the end of the dinner. Celebrating the new bonds they would form, from now on.

  
  


And Tony was glad, about that little… Thing, he had.

  
  


…

  
  


“Don’t worry Peter, eventually I will convince Tony to let you come along, to see the Avengers. What about it?” said Steve.

  
  


Tsc.

  
  


“Ok, I will leave now before you spoil this kid even more.”

  
  


“No! Please! Let me meet them someday, please! I promise I will behave!” Peter pleaded.

  
  


“Someday, kid. Now, Happy will take you home, ok? Don’t forget to give your aunt the pizza we ordered her.” Tony gave the boy the box he already left back on the table. “Brush your teeth, go to sleep at the right time and don’t skip school.”

  
  


“I wouldn’t do it, Mr. Stark.”

  
  


And Tony, Tony wanted to mess with the boy’s hair, in a caring way. Tony wanted to hug the boy.

  
  


But he didn’t.

  
  


He just gave Peter a firm handshake and waved goodbye.

  
  


...

  
  


Tony dreamt about Pepper that night.

  
  


They were sitting in a beautiful garden in France, looking at the Eiffel Tower and drinking tea with tiny little cupcakes. They could fit on  the tip of Tony’s finger but were surprisingly good.

  
  


“So, you finally met Peter” she said, throwing her long hair over her shoulder. She was dressed in a flowery summer dress and was so beautiful.

  
  


Tony’s eyes were filled with tears, but he was acting normally, in the dream. Smiling, laughing.

  
  


“Yeah. He is a brilliant kid.”

  
  


“Took it after me, of course.” she sipped a bit of tea, poorly hiding her smile with the fancy porcelain.

  
  


“You would like him.”

  
  


“I already do, Tony. I love him. Every tiny bit of my son is perfect.” she put the tea-cup away, and took a deep breath, closing her eyes.

  
  


She looked satisfied. Proud.

  
  


“He would love you too.” Tony said, in a small voice. “He would love meeting you.”

  
  


She opened her eyes, shiny with crystalized tears. “So introduce us, Tony.”

  
  


“What…”

  
  


“Let me meet my son, love.”

  
  


She stood up, held his face with both of her hands, and kissed him.

  
  
  


And when Tony opened his eyes back, she was gone, leaving only her frilly dress and an empty cup.

  
  
  
  
  


Tony woke up sweating.

  
  


He kicked his sheets away and stumbled to his workshop.

  
  
  


“Mr. Stark, it’s three fifty-five AM, are you sure this is the best hour for you to…”

  
  


“F.R.I.D.A.Y, I have a lot of work to do, and if I don’t start now, I will go insane, ok?”

  
  


“Should I make coffee?” the A.I. asked, turning on Tony’s automatic coffee machine.

  
  


“You don’t even have to ask.”

  
  


…

  
  


Peter was trying his best to regain focus on his life, after the most recent news.

  
  


Iron Man, Tony Stark was his biological father

 

Iron Man, Tony Stark, was dating… Married? Captain America’s partner!!!

 

HE MET THEM. HE ATE PIZZA WITH THEM. HE WAS GOING TO MEET THE AVENGERS SOMEDAY.

  
  


He wanted to scream a cuss word. He wanted to roll around on his tiny room and bite his own feet.

  
  


Luckily, he didn’t. But he did look back for all of his little toy figures of the Avengers he bought when he was younger.

  
  


It was a shame so many people were mad or just wary about their actions after Sokovia, but Peter could understand.

  
  


He had only been Spiderman for a few weeks now, and some people were already saying awful things about him.

  
  


Shit.

  
  


He was Spiderman.

  
  


And his father was Tony Stark, Iron Man.

  
  


Was he going to tell him? Oh my god.

  
  


That was a dilemma Peter didn’t think he was going to face. His father was also a superhero! What would he say?

  
  


He could be understanding and help him. Or he could just tell Peter to never, ever do it again.

  
  
  


The boy laid down on the bed and covered his eyes with his arm.

  
  


I mean… It would be super unfair if he simply told Tony his biggest secret like that since he hasn’t told aunt May yet. Even if he was planning to never, ever tell her, he could only picture how mad she would get.

  
  


_ “You told your father a secret you kept from me? Peter, I taught you to poop and changed your diapers! And when you would pee your bed because you were afraid of carpet monsters biting your toes when you went to the bathroom during the night, who cleaned it? And now you treat me like this?  Trusting Mr. Rich Stark over me?" _

 

He loved how dramatic aunt May could be if she wanted to.

  
  


And… It was not like Peter would make it super obvious. He could just… Not tell Tony. And it would be fine… Right?

  
  
  


Well, it was not like he could focus on it right now.

  
  


‘Cause right now he was too busy with that physics homework that was so strenuously long. He hoped he could finish it quickly so he could have one hour or so of patrolling that night.

  
  


He turned around again, slipping a bit of his body out of the bed so he could reach the open notebook, sighed, and started to work again.

  
  


…

  
  


It was a good patrol that night.

  
  


Just an assault threat that Spiderman managed to deal with pretty easily since the robber was just a scared teenager, that dropped his gun and ran away, leaving the poor university teacher and his car alone.

  
  


Spider also helped a drunk woman to open her door and enter home safely, and changed a bird’s nest to a tree that was not bound to fall down in the next heavy rain.

  
  


It was 00:49 when he entered back home. A little bit too late, but he got hungry during the middle of the patrol, so he stopped to buy a kebab.

  
  


He was so hungry now that he was on T.

  
  


Oh, yeah, that was also a huge thing on Peter’s life. He was, right now, 4 months on T.

  
  


He was very tense before the whole treatment  started, even though he was so anxious about it. How would his new spider-like body react to the hormone?

  
  


It ended up accepting it pretty well, fortunately. Too well, if Peter was being honest, cause only 4 months in, his voice had dropped down considerably, hair was growing everywhere and his muscles were growing like crazy. He didn't have the physique of a jock, but he was pretty darn close.

  
  


But he was also having a lot of spots, his hair had to be washed way more now, and he was so, so so hungry all the time.

  
  


So, even after the kebab, when he undressed and hid his suit on a trapdoor on the ceiling, he went to the kitchen to make a sandwich.

  
  


He tried to be sneaky, but of course, it wasn’t enough to not wake up aunt May.

  
  


“Peter? I thought you were asleep already.” she yawned, standing up from the sofa she was previously sleeping in, after watching a movie.

  
  


“Oh, I’m sorry I just got hungry. You know. T midnight snack?”

  
  


She looked at the clock. “One AM snack, you mean?” She rubbed her eyes and yawned again. “Will you make one for me too?”

  
  


“Yeah, sure.”

  
  
  


Peter had already finished preparing the two tuna sandwiches when his aunt came to the kitchen. She kissed his head.

  
  


“You should take a shower. You’re smelly.”

  
  


He laughed. Of course, he was. T made him a sweaty hungry monster!

  
  


“I will. Tomorrow. Now, here is your sandwich. Can we share this last bit of orange juice?”

  
  


She nodded and they sat together.

  
  
  


In the middle of the snack, she said.

  
  


“I talked to Tony Stark today. He sent me a couple of messages. Asked if you liked any sports so he could take you to a game.”

  
  


They laughed together. He and Tony Stark in a baseball game or something? Incredible imagery.

  
  


“How is it going with him? Does he treat you well?”

  
  


“Yeah. He is nice. I like him a lot. We have a lot in common.” Peter bit his sandwich and chewed it slowly. “I mean… He still has some issues with the whole father thing.”

  
  


“What do you mean?”

  
  


“I call him Mr. Stark.” Peter blushed. It was such an awkward and somehow embarrassing thing to do. But, what else could he call him? Tony sounded too intimate, and Dad… “I guess he is still adapting.”

  
  


“Does he call you son?”

  
  


“No, he calls me kid or Peter. But Steve does it, so…”

  
  


“Who’s Steve?”

  
  


Fuck.

  
  


I mean, F-word!

  
  


“Uhhh… Can you promise not to tell anyone? Please, please. Can you keep this secret?”

  
  


“Peter, I kept this secret for 15 years.” she vaguely pointed to him and to her phone.

  
  


“Ok, so, Captain America…”

  
  
  


In the end, Peter was not exactly the best on keeping secrets. But at least, he tried.

  
  


...

  
  


Steve was good at keeping secrets, but he was not perfect.

  
  


After all, he was not the perfect man™.

  
  


He was never as calm during his sleep. He would babble things about his past. About the wars.

  
  


He was rarely at home lately. He was rarely at their bed.

  
  


But so was Tony.

  
  


His bed was now his work table. Coffee was his primary food source.

  
  


And it was better like that.

  
  


…

  
  


“Peter invited you for his birthday” Tony said once when they were having a decent breakfast together.

  
  


“I can’t, I’m going to Mexico.”

  
  


“Do what, in Mexico?”

  
  


“Work. Bad people doing bad things. The same.”

  
  


Steve would kiss Tony’s head, then his lips, and go get his stuff.

  
  


“What about you?” he asked when he came back, backpack on, a cap on his face. “You’re succeeding in your new project?”

  
  


“Yeah. It’s a lot harder than I thought but… I’m getting there.”

  
  


“Good.”

  
  


Steve kissed his head again.

  
  


“I will be back soon. I promise. And tell Peter I’m going to compensate him for it. We can play baseball if he fancies it. Or watch a movie. What do kids like these days?”

  
  


“Tsc, you know, one of those super-hero bullshits made only for capitalism.” Tony smirked. They had a few movies heavily inspired on the Avengers. They were called the very original Revengers. Tony thought it was pathetic. “Be safe.”

  
  


“I will”

  
  


And with that, Steve left to be Captain America once again.

  
  
  


“F.R.I.D.A.Y, do you think we can finish our project before Peter’s birthday?”

  
  


“Well, I think it’s unlikely sir…”

  
  


“Poppycock!” Tony faked some TV accent. “I guess we gotta work all night again.”

  
  


“Sir, the amount of coffee you’re taking can cause a heart attack.”

  
  


“Yeah, yeah, I know. Just keep the 911 on the dial, ok?”

  
  


Tony stood up, stretched his back and went back to his cave again.

  
  


…

  
  


In the end, he couldn’t finish it ‘till Peter’s birthday.

  
  


But it was okay. F.R.I.D.A.Y. reminded him how he wanted a professional camera, so he bought it for the boy.

  
  


The birthday party was a small, casual one. Only him, May and Happy. Peter said he couldn’t call his school friends if he was there, but that he had celebrated with them before.

  
  


Tony could tell that he was lying about it, but it sounded very rude to assume your… Son… Don’t have any friends. So he just nodded.

  
  


If that's the truth, it was a disappointing one.

  
  


Tony really liked Peter.

  
  


And he noticed it, while he was happily clapping, singing, for the boy’s 15th birthday.

  
  


The candles were lighting his face and that smile.

  
  


It was a good smile.

  
  


It was Pepper’s smile.

  
  
  


Peter blew the candles.

  
  


…

  
  
  


_ “I want to never lose anyone again.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a spotify playlist that I listen to inspire myself. It's not 100% complete, I don't think I will ever be able to say 'Ok, this one is absolutely ready', but yeah. Anyway. Just if y'all want.  
> If you want me to make this playlist on youtube or any other midia, hit me up.  
> Here is the link: https://open.spotify.com/user/2b20iaduwncblkiivklg86jtp/playlist/7AEgGw6n66I2cIxbhSuyNP.
> 
> See y'all soon!


	5. 2016 - I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god I'm so sorry it took so long. Basically this chapter was ready but I like to post it only when I have the next one ready, and since the sixth chapter is huge...
> 
> I really hope you enjoy it! We arrive at the Civil War territories that are probably going to be explored on three chapters. I just wonder how it will be with Infinity War and Endgame. Oof.
> 
> Edit 1: I just noticed I didn't update my 'insert famous game here' thing. I had a version that I corrected it but apparently I lost it. Here it is anyway.

**2016**

 

How much guilt can a single man feel?

 

Tony Stark believed he was feeling all of it.

 

He couldn't sleep. In fact, he barely could sleep those days, but now it was even worse.

 

The only days he could sleep was with Steve. He tried to convince himself that it was only because they would usually have sex before, and physical exhaustion…

 

But it was obviously more than this.

 

It was because when Tony's nightmares came out to haunt him, he would wake up safe in his bed, held by someone he loved.

 

And it would make Tony angry at himself. That would make him take even more sleeping pills.

 

He was a 41 years-old man, Iron Man, he couldn't need a human teddy bear to sleep.

 

But apparently, that was indeed the case.

 

…

 

Sometimes, Peter would sleep in his apartment.

 

They were usually nice Fridays, were the boy would be seen on his center table, doing homework, or playing video games and talking about his… Teenager things.

 

And Tony would do his best to listen and understand him. Even if he didn’t care.

 

They were growing closer and closer with time. They were hanging out, learning more of each other.

 

They did all sort of things. Bowling with May and Happy, trying to cook something for May's birthday and almost burning her kitchen down. When Peter hurt his _wrist in suspicious circumstances_ that Tony didn’t want to ask further (he hoped by now May already had the birds and bees talk to him), the boy asked him to apply his testosterone shot.

 

And who would say Tony would be so insecure with a needle.

 

They were out together in the world so much, that they had to create a false internship for Peter, to make it a little less suspect.

 

But it was obvious to the naked eye that they were more than mentor and pupil.

 

Even if Tony didn’t fully acknowledge it.

 

Once, Tony took Peter to his workplace. He let the boy wear the suit for 5 minutes and showed him bits of his lab. Not everything. He would hate to ruin the surprise…

 

Oh! And Tony was teaching Peter the basics of driving, and now the boy was proudly able to drive in circles around his apartment block.

 

Apartment, yes, cause Peter moved out from the house he grew up in. It was still on Queens, but it was still quite a change. So, Tony helped them.

 

Happy was there too, helping May to carry those huge boxes upstairs, laughing together at some flirty anecdote.

 

And Tony was happy about it. That roleplay of ‘I'm a normal person with normal problems’. Those moments were the major situation was losing the bolts needed to mount May's wardrobe.

  


But then Tony would wake up, sweating cold, heart too fast, after seeing flashes of wars, of loved ones dying.

 

Peter died in that one nightmare, and Tony never thought he would see anything that bad.

 

But he looked to the side, to the weight on his shoulder, and saw a drooling, deeply asleep tenager, that every once in a while would babble something about ‘Liz’ and ‘No aunt May I swear I didn't!’ and… And Tony was be able to breath again.

 

He moved himself slightly on the sofa, in a position that wasn't going to destroy his neck musculature in the next day, careful so Peter wouldn't wake up.

 

And then, minutes later, fell asleep again.

 

And had no more nightmares.

 

...

 

So, when the morning came, he put on some discrete clothes and went to Midtown School of Science and Technology.

 

He entered the school as some interested father, thinking about the future of his young son. And after some short introduction, he was left to his own devices, to look around and know more about the school.

 

And Tony was weirdly interested in it. He wanted to see what kind of classes was Peter having, and the opportunities he had to learn things there.

 

Almost like a real interested father.

 

But Tony would never explain it in those words.

 

He was going to the cafeteria, to see if he could get some coffee and send Peter a message, but, while walking fast on the corridor, he heard an annoying voice.

 

“Guys, you won't believe it! Parker forgot it's penis in the bathroom!”

 

It made Tony stop walking.

 

He was quite far from the kids, but he could still listen.

 

What should he do?

 

He turned back, slightly, seeing a girl trying to stop the idiot.

 

“Ooh! Look Penis Parker! Liz is defending you! How cute!”

 

And Tony knew that Peter wouldn't do anything.

 

‘Cause fighting with high school bullies was simply not his type.

 

He just turned his back to the boy.

 

“I told you nothing would happen. It's funny, I always thought people like Parker… You know… Trannies… Were more aggressive. But I guess Parker just isn't…”

 

Tony was about to go there and fight the kid right there, but the girl, Liz, slapped him in the face.

 

“If you don't stop it right now Flash, I'm going to drag you to the director.”

 

And the boy, Flash, was there static, rubbing his cheek.

 

Suddenly, Tony was happy that Peter would murmur her name while sleeping.

 

Talking about Peter… Where was Peter?

 

The boy had vanished from Tony's sight after that small distraction.

 

Apparently Tony would have to skip his coffee.

  


The classes were ending, so Tony logically deduced that Peter would be somewhere outside.

 

He found Flash Thompson, the boy that was bullying Peter, first and decided to do _something_.

 

Tony pulled off his cap and put on his glasses.

 

“Excuse me, but have you seen Peter Parker? I have an emergency and I need to contact him.”

 

The boy was left stuttering.

 

“I-I saw him going there… Probably going home.” he pointed to a side. “A-are you really…?”

 

“Tony Stark, Iron Man, yes. If you see Peter, please tell him to contact me. It's very important, for an Avengers mission.”

 

And then, Tony left, leaving the boy with his jaw agape.

  


Tony found Peter crouching on the side of a trash can on an alley next to his school. He could only see his back, legs and feet. He was wearing the shoes Tony gave him.

 

“Hi.” he said, and the boy jumped, kicking the trash can. “What are you doing here?”

 

Peter looked embarrassed. And scared.

 

“I was just… Wait, what are _you_ doing here?”

 

Tony lift a brow, and crossed his arms to the boy's move, but answered his question, deciding that sometimes teenagers do weird and incomprehensible things.

 

“Came to pick you up. We’re going for a ride.” Tony said, already walking out of the alley with Peter.

 

“Where to?”

 

“The New Avengers Facility.”

 

The boy stopped him.

 

“What?”

 

“Yeah. I thought you would like to meet everyone.”

 

Peter's eyes were shining.

 

“That’s… Incredible. Thank you Tony.”

 

Peter rarely called him Tony. It was generally Mr. Stark or the neutral ‘you’.

 

It made Tony's heart feel warm.

 

But he didn't say anything.

 

“Now, let's go, I don’t want to come there and see that they left for a mission god knows where.”

  


They walked and got on the car, and Peter put on his seatbelt.

 

“Huh. Nice hoodie.” he pointed out ironically to the red and blue fabric with a silly spider drew on.

 

“Oh! Y-yeah… Thanks… I'm not cold anyway so…” and he quickly pulled it off and threw it in his bag.

 

Peter was a very weird kid sometimes.

  


“Oh, and that Liz girl that you talk about in your sleep,” Tony made a positive finger, already turning on the car. “I approve her.”

 

“Oh my god!” Peter blushed and hid his face on his hands.

 

“For real, she seems very smart and…”

 

“Stop! Please just stop this torture!”

 

And Tony laughed, ‘cause he loved to slightly annoy Peter.

 

He loved…

  


Smiling, he turned on the music.

 

…

 

In the middle of the way to the Avengers Facility, Peter started to talk.

 

Because he was, of course, too anxious to manage to shut up.

 

He told Tony which Avengers were his favourite ones. He told Tony what he wanted to say to every single one of them, and what he wanted to ask. And would Steve let him hold the shield? Could he fly with Sam wings? Well, maybe with a bit of training…

 

So when they finally saw the building on distance, Tony almost cried of happiness.

 

He sent a message to Steve a few minutes earlier to force everyone to come to lounge, life or death situation.

 

So, when they entered there, they were all waiting.

 

Literally all waiting, with suits and weapons.

 

And then Tony Stark came up with a nervous teen under his arm.

 

…

 

“Tony, what does that…” Natasha begin.

 

“So. This is Peter. He is my son and he was very anxious to meet you all.”

 

They were all uncredible and silent.

 

And then Peter held his palm up and said “Hi. I'm Peter Parker.”

  


“Who knew Tony Stark would be able to produce a son.” Sam said jokingly, when they were all sitting around.

 

 _Who knew Tony Stark would be able to say the word ‘son’ without flinching_.

 

“I mean, nowadays I can't really say. Too much time in a metal suit, who knows what that can cause.” Tony shrugged and smirked. “I should probably tell that to Rhodes.”

 

And all the eyes were back to Peter, who was sitting in the middle of the sofa, looking with impressed eyes to all of the weapons and armoury in the room.

 

But he was suddenly shy. Afraid of doing something wrong, maybe. Afraid of being censored, probably.

 

“Peter, think fast.” a familiar voice came from the corner of the room, followed by a blur of movement.

 

And now Peter was holding Captain America’s shield.

 

“Oh my god.” Peter gasped.

 

“Good reflexes kid. Most people would've been decapitated by it.” Sam complemented.

 

“Don't be so dramatic. I didn't throw it like that. And we've been training right?” Steve said, coming closer.

 

Peter nodded, gave the shield back to the blonde. They also developed a good relationship on the moments they were together. And yes, Tony saw it too many times now, Steve throwing random objects at Peter.

 

The boy really had good reflexes, cause Tony never saw him miss one.

 

The ice was now somewhat broken and Steve invited Peter for a walk around, to see the training room and the open feels and the screening room. Sam and Wanda followed them.

 

Natasha stayed there with Tony.

 

“So. When? How? Who?”

 

“Pepper. He grew up his uncle and aunt.”

 

“I thought the baby had died too… But wasn't it a g…”

 

“His name is Peter. He is a good, very smart kid. We’ve been meeting for a few months now.”

 

Natasha let that sink down for a few second.

 

“Ok then. Is he going to stay here for the whole weekend?”

 

“That's the plan.”

 

She smiled.

 

“I'm going to call Clint. He needs to see this.”

  


Having set things up with Peter, Tony went after Vision.

 

It would be good to work his old synthetic brained buddy.

 

No offense to F.R.I.D.A.Y.

 

…

 

Peter was feeling… Amazed.

 

It was more than happy, more than excited it was just… Incredible.

 

He sent a message to aunt May, explaining that yes, he basically had been kidnapped, but it was by Tony so it was ok.

 

He sent her a selfie he asked them to take with him and she responded with clapping emojis.

 

The building was amazing. Everything was expensive and high-tech and he could picture so many cool things happening there.

 

And he knew that he was asking more than any of his guides would be able to explain, but it didn't stop him.

 

They were so cool!

 

He knew Steve was awesome, they met sometimes. But Sam was so funny and Wanda was so sweet and...

 

And… Peter had to be extra careful to not expose himself as Spiderman.

 

That was… Tough.

 

“How much time are you going to spend with us Peter?” Wanda asked, in her lovely accent.

 

“I don't know. Mr. Stark didn't really told me. But I would love to stay the weekend. There is so much to explore here.”

 

“Just don't break anything and you're fine.” Sam advised. “Oh, hey, the new adjusts on the EXO-7 are ready for testing. Wanna see, kid?”

 

“Can I test it?” Peter's eyes grew.

 

“No. But you can watch.”

 

“Fine by me.”

 

And Peter went with Sam, Steve and Wanda to the open field.

 

...

 

It was incredible.

 

Wanda also started training. She was now lifting and moving different weight (enormous weights), and trying to put them delicately on specific stops.

 

And Sam… Sam was flying.

 

He was literally there, flying with his Falcon wings, and Peter, hugging his legs, wished very hard that he had been bitten by a bird or any flying insect. Even though flying insects probably wouldn’t provide him with a pair of carbon fiber wings with such an on point rigidity-flexibility ratio that made his nerd side sigh.

 

He kept watching with awe.

 

Steve called him.

 

“I can't fully combat you, but I can train you the basics of fighting, if you want. For self-defense and all.”

 

Gosh, Peter wanted it.

 

But he couldn’t. How would he fake down his physical strength in that situation. In front a bunch of Superheroes.

 

“I’m fine here!” Peter said. “Keep on training. I’m loving watching you all.”

 

Steve sat down with Peter.

 

“So, how are you?”

 

Steve was slightly sweaty from _playing combat_ with Sam. His hair was shining under the sun, and his muscles were pulsing under the shirt.

 

And damn, Tony was so lucky.

 

Peter blushed. It was one of those times were a hot guy would enter the room and Peter brain would be all “Do I want to be him or do I want to kiss him?”

 

Bissexual problems, Peter guessed, and stopped thinking about Steve's looks.

 

“Uh, yeah, I’m fine. More than fine because I'm here of course but… Everything is alright.”

 

“Even at school?”

 

Ok. Steve was going somewhere.

 

And this somewhere was something that Peter didn't want to talk about ‘cause it was so small.

 

They were all superheroes with super important problems. He himself also had more to care about than a silly rich kid that found funny to mock a transgender classmate just cause he was different.

 

It frustrated Peter cause Flash wasn't even a mean guy he was just one of those stupid kids that thought that transgender teens were all special snowflakes and _‘Did you just assume my gender???’_. A normal teenager idiot.

 

But heck, that idiot made him feel so bad about himself. All he ever wanted was to seen as a normal kid. It was hard for him to do normal things. He never entered sports, he had to fight to be able to dress up in the boys changing room and… And there was Flash, mocking him because his stupid packer fell off his pants.

 

Peter didn’t want that to be a problem.

 

“See, Peter. When I woke up in this new century I discovered a lot of things. Racism had changed a lot, which is good and I really want it to end already. I discovered that gay people were already able to get married. And I discovered transgender people.”

 

He made a pause.

 

“And I'm not going to lie. It was confusing at first. I was a poor christian boy from Brooklyn. It was a whole new world open to me. But I tried my best to understand. And now I do. I never looked at you and saw you as anything different than myself. And if I, an 100 years-old guy am able to understand and accept you, if someone younger is not… I guess he shouldn’t be on the decathlon team.”

 

Peter blinked in realization. “Tony saw it… When did he… How did…”

 

“You underestimate your father's ability to put F.R.I.D.A.Y to investigate someone's life. And he types _really_ fast.”

 

Peter smiled. Tony cared about him. He knew it already, but he cared enough about him to ask Steve to give that pep talk.

 

“And Peter, let me tell you something. If Tony really seen what happened and didn't interveened, it’s because he really thought you could handle it yourself. And it means a lot.”

 

Yeah. It did. It all did.

 

“Peter, wanna go inside and play with me? We have Overwatch and no one really knows how to play it.” Sam called.

 

“I know.” Wanda complained.

 

“No, you know how to cheat, and that's not cool.”

 

"How do you even cheat on Overwatch?"

 

 

“You should go there.” Steve said. “It's a mission I can't help them with.”

 

He patted the boy on the back and left. They were leaving for a mission in Lagos soon and he had different ways to relax.

 

…

 

“Are you going to give her a body?” Vision asked. In front his eyes, brain conections all in red, developing, growing, expanding.

 

Living, really.

 

It was strange for Tony. To see Vision there. Alive, walking and talking.

 

He was also living, but it was something completely different.

 

“I wouldn’t be able to. I… I don't want to.”

 

“She probably does not want it either.” Vision said. He was not condescendigly smiling to Tony, as a full human being would do it.

 

A standard human.

 

Vision only looked at that intricate neural network.

 

“Tony.” Steve’s voice got his attention. The blonde was standing there, on the entering of the lab, beautiful as always. “Are you busy?”

 

“Just showing Vision a project. But I finished doing it already.”

 

Was it too selfish, to need a bit of Steve? After all those ups and downs, his mouth and body were still soothing.

 

Were still a happy place on a messy dangerous world.

 

So, they left the workshop directly to the room.

  


And they obviously didn't see Vision closing his eyes and letting the mind stone shine, touching those new artificial brain cells with caressing fingers made of pure universe energy.

 

And she felt alive.

 

…

 

Peter was left alone at some point, which was a huge mistake.

 

Because now he was tumbling around the complex, without really knowing where he was.

 

Yeah, he had a good sense of direction, but all or his senses were over the place in that moment. Because he was somewhere new, because he was so excited about everything and his brain felt like a literal squirrel.

 

He then entered a room.

 

It was quite a discrete one, having no object that demonstrated explicit interest. No family pictures, no sport team, no music poster.

 

It almost seemed like an empty room, but there it was.

 

Pink ballerina shoes, not in display but also not hidden. Just… Away of public view.

 

It made Peter think.

 

Many years ago, when he was still a little kid, he loved every single physical thing that existed. Running? Jiu Jitsu? Basketball? Awesome!

 

But he… He also liked ballet.

 

And it was so obvious why. Ballet dancers were always so gracious and strong, conscient about their bodies.

 

Peter was extremely happy when he started swinging around the town, when he started to feel his body less of a mess of limbs and growing muscles, but as a unity. Bendable, flexible whole.

 

And when nobody could see, he would close his eyes and dance ballet.

 

On the top of a building, hoodie on. Completely vulnerable to anyone who wanted to attack him or spread that ‘have seen Spiderman dancing like a lady’.

 

But that was exactly what he loved. Even though he could be badly hurt, ridicularized. Even if his dysphoria screamed that ‘This is a girl’s dance!’.

 

Peter couldn’t give a shit.

 

He was holding those shoes when he heard someone clearing their throat, demanding his attention.

 

And there she was, Black Widow herself, arms crossed, curious expression.

 

“H-hi! I really didn’t want to invade your room, I just got lost and…” he noticed he was still clutching the shoes against his chest. He blushed even more. “I-I’ll leave… Ok?”

 

“It’s okay, Peter.” she smiled a little. “You can put it over there though. I don’t really like people messing my stuff.”

 

Peter obeyed the beautiful and also incredibly dangerous woman.

Wow. He thought he was speechless in front of the other avengers, but being in a room with Natasha Romanoff was… Something else.

 

“Do you like ballet?” she asked, and suddenly Peter felt naked in front of her. Despite his muscles, the tiny furs growing on his chin and his now showing jawline, he felt that she could see inside his clothes, seeing a body the government wanted to dictate.

 

He couldn’t say anything.

 

And Natasha, probably smelling his fear or something cool like that, said.

 

“I know a lot of boys that like ballet. That doesn’t not make you less masculine or anything.” and smiled.

 

It was a sweet gesture. Caring, even.

 

Peter relaxed.

 

“Yeah… I guess I do. I never really learned it…”

 

“Would you like me to teach you?”

 

“...

  


…Yes”

 

…

 

Tony felt at home.

 

Which was a weird feeling, but a very comprehensible one. After all, he was surrounded by the ones he loved, wasn’t he?

 

They were all there.

 

There were eating sushi, 4 sushi boats for them all. And Steve was failing on using hashis correctly, and Sam was stealing his pieces and laughing at it. And Wanda and Vision were shyly flirting on the sofa, as they always did.

 

And Peter spilled newly-arrived Clint’s shoyu, staining his white shirt. And Natasha was laughing at it, and saying “I thought you were used to kids dirtying your clothes.”

 

“Yes, I am, to 3 year olds doing it. Not 15 year olds.”

 

“I am sorry! I am so sorry Mr. Hawkeye!”

 

And Tony was drinking a Bloody Mary with Rhodes, listening to blues-rock tracks in the little lounge in the back of the same room, watching the others.

 

“You got a nice family there, Stark.” Rhodes said, drinking more of his own glass.

  


“Hmm. I guess I did.”

 

They cheered, quietly smiling.

 

...

 

On the next week, Lagos happened.

 

And that thing… That family… Started to break, as everything in Tony Stark’s life did.

 

...

 

_Maybe that was the reason he hid behind those iron suits._

 

_They made him feel unbreakable, when everything else shattered in front of his eyes, while titanium and vibranium smashed to pieces light, power and his heart._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it! I hope you enjoyed this little piece of hapiness but also drama at the end! The next one is comming sooner than this one. I swear.
> 
> If you want the fic's playlist in any other platform, feel free to ask! Actually, ask me anything, I love social interaction


	6. 2016 - II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gays, happy pride month! Oh, and my birthday is on the 17th. Luckily the next will come before the day.

**2016**

 

How much guilt can a single man feel?

 

Tony Stark believed he was feeling all of it.

 

He couldn't sleep, because his mind kept repeating those words.

  
  
  


_ You think you fight for us. _

  
  
  


He would close his eyes and dream about standing under the sun of a nice beach with Peter. 

 

The boy was wearing,  _ ridiculous _ , Iron Man patterned shorts, and laughed hard when Tony mentioned it.

 

“So, I'm finally finishing school. And I was thinking about, well, where to go now, right?”

 

As Peter was speaking, he was getting slightly older.

 

Nothing too intense, but he was starting to look like an adult.

 

“Well… You can choose. With your grades, any college would accept you. Harvard, Yale… The MIT…”

 

Tony smiled and elbowed him. He looked to the horizon, where he could see Steve swimming. The rest of his te… Of his frie…

 

Of his family.

 

Were swimming too. And they were smiling. And they were happy.

 

“I wanted to travel before. Liz keeps talking about it. Life changing experiences and all.” 

 

“Yeah. I agree with that. Where do you think about going?”

 

“Sokovia.”

 

And while he watched, Peter's face turned into Charlie Spencer's face. And everything fell on him.

  
  


There was dust. There was blood everywhere.

 

_ My son. _

 

His son.

  
  


_ Who is going to avenge my son, Stark? He’s dead… And I blame you. _

  
  
  


“Dad!” Peter's voice sounded, muffled, under all of the rubble.

 

“Mom!” Charlie Spencer’s voice cried for help.

  
  


And then, silence.

  
  
  


Tony woke up.

  
  


He was alone in his bed. Steve was lost in his own misery.

 

And Peter…

  
  


He stood up and checked the clock. 3 am. It was too late. Way too late. But he needed to try.

  
  


He dialed the number.

 

He didn’t care if it went to the mailbox. He just needed to listen to that teenager’s voice message, that said.

 

“This is a test. This is a test of the Answering Machine Broadcast System. This is only a test…” in a fake robot voice, followed by. “No, it’s me, Peter. You can leave your message after the”

 

It was always cut because the message was too long.

  
  


And Tony waited for the message, shaking for no reason besides his own nightmares.

 

He waited.

  
  


But it never came.

  
  
  


Instead, Peter replied.

 

“M-mr. Stark? Why are you calling? A-are you ok?”

 

There was a subtle tone of pain on Peter’s voice. And all of Tony’s blood rushed from his head. He felt light.

 

“Are you ok? Are you in pain? Where are you?”

 

There was a present city noise on the background of the phone call.

 

“Is it a party? Are you lost? Peter, where are you, I’m going to…”

 

“No, no, Tony I’m fine. I’m fine.” the boy breathed heavily against the phone. “I’m already at home. It’s ok. I’m not hurt.”

 

Tony couldn’t believe. Tony wanted to scream. What has happened? If someone touched on a string of that boy’s hair…

 

“I swear I am fine.” Peter repeated. “Why did you call?”

  
  


“Was it a nightmare?” he asked, in a soft voice. 

 

But Tony didn’t reply.

 

He was crying.

 

“Do you want me to keep talking to you? Does it help you to sleep?” Peter suggested.

 

“I’m fine. It’s okay. You have classes earlier today. Go to sleep.”

 

“But Tony…”

 

“Go to sleep, Parker.” Tony tried to sound light, happy even. But it was hard when his hands were still shaking like this.

 

“Good night, Mr. Stark. Try to sleep too, ok?”

  
  
  


Tony didn’t sleep that night.

 

…

 

When the Secretary of State called him in that morning, Tony wanted to say ‘no’. He wanted to turn off the call, to say something witty but stupid and probably unlawful.

 

But Tony was filled with guilt and fear.

  
  


He looked at the video he paused, the same youtube video he had watched over and over again on these days.

  
  


He accepted the proposition Ross made.

  
  
  


...

 

Tony knew there would be discussions. He was, technically, ready for them.

 

But now, it was awful.

 

Because he knew what was the right thing to do. And he hated it, but he was afraid.

 

Afraid of hurting even more people. Afraid of losing his friends in battle.

 

Afraid of ruining that little family he managed to find. Especially because it was something related to work.

 

And what was worse than have your husband looking at you like that because of work?

 

He covered his face and prayed for Vision and Rhodes to bring them all reason.

 

But he knew it wouldn't be enough.

  
  


Natasha called him and he had to face them again.

 

“Tony. You are being uncharacteristically non-hyperverbal.” she said, eyes analytical as they always were.

 

“It's because he's already made up his mind.” Steve said.

 

“Boy, you know me so well.” Tony got up and felt the huge pain on his skull, like sharp needles penetrating his bones “Actually, I'm nursing an electromagnetic headache.”

 

He walked to the kitchen, trying to find coffee. His addiction even worse now that he barely could sleep and relied on caffeine to not pass out of exhaustion.

 

“That's what's going on, Cap. It's just pain. It's discomfort. Who's putting coffee grounds in the disposal? Am I running a bed and breakfast for a biker gang?” 

 

He tried to lightly complain about it, as he did with other things on the Facility. After all, he was like a father who was always traveling and left the house on the hands of the other father, who couldn't keep an eye on every one of the kids, that ran around doing stupid shit. Natasha was supposed to be the babysitter, and Rhodes was the godfather that failed on bringing gifts.

 

He got even worse after picturing it in his head. 

  
  


He thought about Peter.

  
  


He showed them Charles.

  
  


But it wasn’t enough for Steve, of course. That perfect soldier. 

 

And he knew Tony. He knew Tony so well. Inside and out.

 

And suddenly Tony remembered about why he was so unsure about starting a relationship with someone he worked with.

  
  


And Wanda…

 

Wanda was afraid. And Tony knew why she was afraid.

 

But Tony was also afraid. He was afraid when he first met the girl and she made him see those horrible images. And he couldn’t blame the world if it was afraid too.

  
  


She was just 19.

  
  


“We would protect you.” said Vision to her. Because of course, they would. But Tony still wasn’t keen on the idea of risking his people.

 

Damn, he feared Wanda, but he _ feared for her  _ too.

 

Why couldn’t they understand it?

  
  


“Maybe Tony's right.”

 

It was a shock, to listen to these words coming out of Natasha’s mouth.

 

“Focus up. I'm sorry, did I just mishear you or did you agree with me?”

 

“Oh, I want to take it back now.”

 

“No, no, no. You can't retract it. Thank you. Unprecedented. Okay, case closed - I win.”

 

Tony wasn’t happy, but he was feeling better. Was it the headache pills, was it because Natasha made a very reasonable point and she had incredible convincing skills? He would take anything.

  
  


Steve wasn’t happy, and he probably wasn’t feeling any better.

 

He checked his phone, and said, sharply like a newly bought knife, cutting every question that could possibly come after

 

“I have to go.”

  
  


And he did go, to who knows where, and Tony sat down and drank the rest of his coffee, that tasted as bad as the look on his lover’s face.

  
  


…

 

Peggy Carter died, and Tony knew exactly how Steve was feeling right now.

 

And he wanted to talk to him. To hug him, support him or anything like that.

 

Anything a husband should do, right?

  
  


But Steve didn't even tell him about it. Natasha did because Natasha was able to leave all of that important mess to run to Steve because she knew he wouldn’t push her back.

 

He would do it to Tony, certainly.

  
  


With an absurd weight on his chest, he told Natasha

 

“Take care of him”

 

Because it was all he could do at the moment.

 

…

 

Tony knew Steve wouldn't sign the accords. And while it was frustrating and scary… Tony couldn’t do anything.

 

Maybe later… Maybe later things would be fine.

 

He thought about it while he signed the papers.

  
  


He felt like he was signing a divorce file.

  
  


Tony stood up, feeling suffocated.

 

He unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt and took off his jacket.

 

“Where are you going, Mr. Stark?” Vision asked, seeing his creator grabbing car keys.

 

“I'm going to take some air. Call me if you need me, or if you have any news about Steve. And… Keep an eye on Wanda.”

 

And Vision agreed because if someone was worried about Wanda, it was him.

  
  


When Tony discovered, by Steve, that Vision and Wanda were… Flirting awkwardly, Tony felt strange.

 

Was a synthetic being able to love?

  
  


He thought about his project, resting in his lab because he was too afraid to… Turn it on. Especially now.

  
  


He needed desperately to see Peter.

 

…

 

Peter felt that something was going on with Tony.

 

He didn’t want to ask and sound invasive, but it was so so obvious. The way he moved and talked like he was in pain. Not physical, but emotional.

 

Peter could distinguish it because  **he** was feeling sore. After a bad sleep night, Peter was a little bit too slow while trying to bounce a building, making his body go like a pancake against the cement wall.

 

At least he was facing the other way and he didn’t break his nose.

 

But Tony… Tony was awfully sad.

  
  


They met three times that week, and Tony was forced to use Uber to pick Peter up, but it was still something suspicious. Even Aunt May was thinking it all was weird.

 

But Tony was really not okay.

 

Peter was staying the week with him, in his apartment.

 

And while it was so cool, because he loved… Spending time with Tony, even if it was just eating tuna sandwiches or watching old movies like the Star Wars ones, Tony was a very good company. At least for Peter.

 

He was trying his best, Peter could see.

 

He bought ice-cream, and they ate it together, even if Tony technically wasn’t eating dairy. But, yeah, he could guess that eating ice cream with his name on the label was an exception they could make (and for the note, the Stark Raving Hazelnuts were, indeed, extraordinary). Tony helped him with his homework, even he had to ask one basic thing or other that he had forgotten (it was a chemistry one, to be fair, not exactly Tony’s specialty), and while Peter felt so good there, so… At home, really, there was something he was missing off.

 

Being Spider-man.

 

Three whole days without patrolling, and he was already feeling uncomfortable. It was different when he had a very hard exam to study and he couldn’t even think about spidering, because he was too focused and too anxious. But right now, he was there, seeing the top of those buildings on every window he looked at, picturing himself weekends ago, days ago,  swinging around, climbing, helping whoever needed.

  
  


Maybe Tony would understand, Peter thought. He was a superhero himself, he, more than anyone, know the deal.

 

But Peter just couldn’t tell him.

  
  


It felt like it was happening all over again.

 

...

Peter came home crying that day. His knee was bleeding and he was dragging his bike with him.

 

He was 7 by then and still responded to a different name and different pronouns. His hair was only recently chopped off, in a fit of anger when he grabbed Aunt May's seam scissors. His aunt and uncle didn't give him a lecture or anything like that. They just wanted to understand why.

 

Why? Peter, not yet Peter, would question himself, not exactly himself.

 

He, not yet he, didn't know.

 

Well, he knew, but he couldn't explain.

 

What would he say? ‘Oh, Aunt May and Uncle Ben, I really want to be a boy!’. It was… Silly. And stupid.

 

They would laugh, of course, they would. It was… A joke. It had to be.

  
  


They asked what happened and not-Peter froze. What would not-he say?

 

Aunt May rushed to grab her first aid kit.

 

But Uncle Ben just sit by his side.

 

“The boys were mean to you?” he asked, softly.

 

Peter could remember he had brown eyes, deep, rich brown eyes that reminded Peter of melted chocolate. When he was nervous about something, he could just look at Uncle Ben's eyes. On the crowd, at distance, right beside him.

 

On his memory.

 

“Tell me what happened Pip.”

 

Pip was Peter's first childhood nickname. Nobody really knew where it came from, but later it would lead Peter to think of, well, Peter.

 

And Pip was now on the spot.

 

Could he lie to Uncle Ben? Could he hide it?

  
  


“The boys said I couldn't play with them.”

 

No. He couldn't.

 

“And they pushed me out of my bike and… And I wanted to fight them because they hurt me and… But they said I couldn't fight with them, because they don't fight girls.” and Peter was crying.

 

But he was also angry.

 

He was shaking, so angry he was.

  
  


Uncle Ben held his hands.

 

“You know violence is not always the answer, right? It is a tool but you shouldn't use it when it's not necessary. And you're angry now, you’re filled with bad feelings. That’s not good for using violence.”

 

Ben was still holding his hands and Pip was still trembling.

 

“The boys were very mean, that's why you're angry?”

 

No answer.

  
  


Ben held up one of his hands to dry the tears of the child.

 

And Peter just let it all go out.

 

“I don't want to be a girl, Uncle Ben.” he said, quickly, going back to crying. “I don't want to be seen as a girl, I'm… I'm not a girl.”

  
  


Uncle Ben hugged him, while Peter cried his eyes out.

 

And he just stood there, telling Peter he loved him, no matter what.

 

…

 

They were having breakfast before Peter could go to school.

 

Eggs and bacon with various types of bread and some mixed-fruit juice.

 

And while Peter was hungrily eating everything that was in his plate, the mind too busy thinking about when and how he would tell Tony he was Spider-man, he couldn’t see how weird Stark was acting.

 

He kept stirring the coffee on his mug with a painful expression, watching the News.

 

Maybe, just maybe Peter should see what it was all about.

 

The Sokovia Accords. Tony briefly mentioned it, and immediately Peter guessed it could be the reason for his obvious sadness, but it was too simple, too impersonal.

 

Peter tried to remain impartial on the subject of registering or not. He couldn't himself decide to whether it was good or bad to have this kind of control, and was just great Spiderman was flying under the radar, so he didn't have to deal with all that.

 

Yes, he wasn’t an Avenger, famous and all, but he didn't have to make difficult decisions like this.

 

A decision that not everyone made together, by what he just heard.

 

_ Captain Steve Roger, mainly know as Captain America is legally being retired, after not signing the Accords, alongside with the Falcon, Sam Wilson, and... _

  
  


Ok. That was… Something.

 

He cleaned his lips with a napkin.

 

“So… Steve is not… An avenger anymore?”

 

“Technically, no.” Tony said, dryly.

 

“And where is he now?”

 

“London. I guess. I don’t know.”

 

“Did you two fight?”

 

Peter wanted to bite his own tongue after this question, but it was needed. If he wanted to help Tony with anything, he needed to know more about the situation.

 

But the look on Tony's face was definitely not worth it.

 

“It’s none of your business.”

 

“Of course it is. You two are my… You two… I care about you two.”

 

“You're still a nosy teenager that has no entitlement to this information.” Tony replied. “To any of this, actually.”

 

The older man drank his coffee quickly, cleaned his mouth with the back of his hand and intended to stood up.

 

“Let’s go. You have classes.”

 

“No, please Mr. Stark, I can get late to this first period. I don't want to fight I just…” Peter started speaking frantically.

 

“Peter,” Tony said his name in a loud, stern tone, but he couldn't keep it for too long before cracking it down, basically falling back on his chair. He rubbed his head once. Then twice. “I don't want to have this discussion, ok? Yes, we fought. Yes, we are not exactly ok, and I don’t know how or if this is going to affect you. But Steve likes you a lot, so he probably won’t simply vanish from your life. Ok?”

  
  


A loud noise interrupted Peter from replying anything.

 

The transmission of the speech given by King was suddenly stopped, the TV transmitting static noises.

 

Tony changed channels, alarmed eyes.

 

The scene was similar until they found a young reporter running, saying to the camera that an explosion happened and that the conference hall had been hit.

  
  


Natasha was there.

 

And Peter, gosh, Peter liked Natasha a lot.

  
  
  


He liked all the Avengers and saw them as friends. He used to watch movies with Wanda, play videogames or running with Sam (Steve told him to say ‘on your left’ every time he passed Sam. It was something Peter tried not to make too often, he was still hiding his powers, but sometimes he just couldn't resist, as Sam always made funny expressions when he heard the phrase), even ate some of Vision's cooking experiments (he made excellent cookies). He met Clint once or twice, but he was still afraid of getting an arrow on his butt for every single mistake he made (like spilling food on Clint. Or eating his food. Or sneezing unfortunately on his food… Why was everything Peter did with him related to food?).

  
  


His relationship with Steve was very good, with the blonde man being the closest thing to Uncle Ben Peter ever found, even if he didn't compare them both.

 

But Natasha, Natasha was almost like a mother.

 

Okay, Peter obviously had a mom and a dad growing up, on his aunt and uncle. And they would be his maternal and paternal figure forever, but that didn't stop new people like Tony and Steve to coming along.

 

Natasha was a surprise.

  
  


It all started with the ballet classes.

  
  


Natasha had a small room where she would practice. It had the whole deal. Mirrors, bars. She bought Peter his shoes, in black beautiful material. He thanked her with a tight hug.

  
  


They would dance for hours, sometimes.

  
  


Sometimes, Peter would just hug his knees and watch her dancing.

 

She was so beautiful. Not like a magical being, a princess or anything people would say to compliment girls, but like a woman. A real-life human woman, with struggles and pain, but also love. Dancing around all of her emotions while she held her leg high, the whole body stretched, or jumped in the air in a perfect grand jeté.

 

And Peter would just stare, in awe.

  
  


“You got a lot better on your assemblé.” she commented once when they were sitting on the ground, sweaty, drinking water and normalizing their breaths and heartbeats.

 

“I have an excellent teacher.” he smiled.

 

She moved around to a little thermal purse and pulled off a small Tupperware container. She opened the lid and revealed strawberries dipped in chocolate.

 

“For your success on not letting me fall earlier today.” she said, with a smile, and ate the first strawberry.

 

Peter laughed. “It was an accident that time, I told you!”

 

They laughed together and Peter stretched his legs again.

 

“Aren't you going to eat?” Natasha asked. Her lips were all smudged with chocolate, giving her a funny look. He gesticulated so she could clean herself.

 

“I can't. I'm allergic to strawberries.”

 

“Oh. I'm sorry.” Nat stopped and then added. “Your mother was allergic too, wasn't her?”

 

Peter just shrugged.

 

“I don’t know much about her. Actually, I know nothing. Just her name and looks. I know she worked for Tony.”

 

Peter felt weird. Talking about his mother was weird.

 

How do you love the memory of someone you never met?

  
  


“You know, Peter, I'm an orphan.” Natasha broke the long silence. “And when was your age… No. Younger than you. I used to question myself who were my parents. Why they left me. I always hated doing it, but it would simply happen. And life is… Unfair to a lot of people. We just are born in situations many aren't and it made me sad. And it made me angry.”

 

Natasha stopped and took a deep breath.

 

“Sometimes we just need to let it go.”

  
  


She stood up and pulled Peter with her, and started dancing.

 

Nothing too complex. Nothing tiring. Just spinning around. Just feeling.

  
  


There were tears in their eyes. But they smiled, eventually. Because they were two unfortunate human beings, dancing together, crying together.

  
  


“You know, there was a time when Barton and I were working together on some missions and when we would feel sad for any reason, we would fight, physically, to let the stress go away.”

 

Peter laughed with the idea.

 

“You two fought a lot?”

 

“Yeah. Sometimes.  Mostly over our faded attempt to a relationship. But this is a secret ok? And a mistake we made too long ago that shouldn’t be remembered.” she smiled. “He is better now, with all of those kids that I love so much.”

 

“Don’t you think about having your own?”

  
  


Natasha stopped for some seconds. She looked… Sad again.

 

But she brushed it off and nuggied Peter’s head, making him laugh.

 

“I work too much, taking care of you all.”

  
  


Steve came to call them, announcing that the dinner was ready.

 

...

  
  


Luckily Natasha was fine. 

 

Peter felt his heart beating against his ribs, quickly, but relieved. How many people can a 15-year-old boy lose in his life?

 

He was so great Nat was okay.

  
  


But it was not over yet.

 

…

 

Natasha had to explain about Bucky. And it was awful.

 

Tony was angry. Because Steve had to do one thing, and it was to not get into trouble. But he did it as soon as he could.

 

And while it was obvious that it would happen, sooner or later, Tony didn’t expect to deal with it  _ so soon _ . He basically had to leave Peter and run, a funny concept since the boy didn’t even live with him.

 

But he was staying at Tony’s lately, and while the boy didn’t know, Tony just wanted to keep the boy under his watch. 

 

And now Peter was somewhere, doing god knows what, while Tony had to negotiate with Ross on the phone.

 

His husband was right by his side. But it was not any better.

  
  


At least it was not jail, he tried to convince Steve and Sam. At least it was not jail, he tried to convince himself.

 

At least, Steve is here. At least he is safe.

 

_ At least he is still your husband. Despite the secret he kept (Never thought about saying ‘Oh, so I thought my best friend was dead, as everyone should be after 70 years. But guess what, he is alive and is a brainwashed serial killer!’, Steve?) and the mess he caused, and the obvious secession on the group… _

 

_ At least he is still with you. _

 

…

 

“How’s Peter?” of course Steve would ask about Peter.

 

“Is fine. At school by this time I guess. Or going home, don’t recall his schedule perfectly.”

 

Steve only nodded and shifted his eyes to the golden pens Tony showed him previously.

 

“He asked me if we are okay. I guess he was afraid we were… Divorcing or something like that. I told you it didn’t matter cause you are never leaving his life. I hope I didn’t lie.”

 

“You didn’t.”

 

“About what part?”

 

Tony sat back, after pacing around in the room, trying to elaborate his words and contain his anxiety.

 

“I’m never leaving Peter. At least, I will try not to.”

 

“I know, cause you’re a very polite person. Mr. Perfect at your service”

 

“I’m not perfect.”

 

Tony snorted. “Yeah, sure. Everything about you is perfect. Like a stupid Ken Doll or something. Even your teeth. You were born before dentists existed, how you managed to accomplish that?”

 

Steve smiled.

 

“And even though I really want to punch your stupid perfect teeth sometimes… Fuck, we are good together. In every single way. We make a great team, and we somehow managed to be together for this long. It doesn’t need to end like this. The Avengers need you. I need you.”

  
  
  


Tony offered the conditions. One signing, three signings, and they would all be free, gadgets and all. And even Bucky, fuck, Bucky would be helped. Treated, instead of arrested for crimes he apparently didn’t commit by will.

 

And Steve was going to do it. He grabbed the pen.

 

And Tony’s heart was beating so fast, cause it meant so much. If he signed, everything would be different, but they would still be together.

 

They could figure it all out, together.

  
  


But of course, he had to talk about Wanda.

  
  


And Steve was, Steve was outraged.

 

“Oh God, Tony! Every time I think you see things the right way…”

  
  


Why couldn’t Steve see that he was only protecting that girl? From the others, from herself. He cared about her, he didn’t want to see her hurting any more people and feeling so guilty about it.

 

Why would Tony want to see anyone else become him?

  
  
  


But of course, Steve, the man of the freedom land, couldn’t see this point of view.

  
  


“She’s a kid!” Steve argued. “Would you do the same to Peter?”

 

“I just did!” Tony said, the realization only now coming to him. “And I don’t regret anything, ok? Give me… Give me a break! I’m doing what has to be done… To stave off something worse.”

 

“You keep telling yourself that.” Steve put the pen down, and the sound of the small metal was louder than every single one of his words. “Hate to break up the set.”

  
  


He left.

  
  


_ He did say he was never leaving… Peter.  _

  
  


…

 

Steve really left. He had no idea where he was.

 

He left, with the assassin maniac and Sam. Ran away, like the criminals the government thought they were.

 

And right now, he had to deal with Ross. Again.

 

“You don’t get it, Stark. It’s not yours to handle. It’s clear you can’t be objective. I’m putting Special Ops on this.”

 

“What happens when the shooting starts? What, do you kill Steve Rogers?” Natasha, with the reason, asked.

 

Only the sound of it made a shiver run down Tony’s spine.  _ You can’t be objective, he said. _

 

“If we’re provoked. Barnes would’ve been eliminated in Romania if it wasn’t for Rogers. There are dead people who would be alive now. Feel free to check my math.”

 

He had to intervene.

 

“All due respect, you’re not going to solve this with boys in bullets, Ross. You gotta let us bring them in.”

 

“How would that end any differently from the last time?”

 

“Because this time, I won’t be wearing loafers and a silk shirt. 72 hours, guaranteed.”

 

Because he still had hope Steve would stop and listen. For god’s sake, he was his husband, he had to.

 

“36 hours. Barnes. Rogers. Wilson.”

 

“Thank you, sir.”

  
  


Then Tony felt it. Like a sweet nature reminder that he was a still a human being, with a beating heart.

 

A heart that was filled with a weird pressure, that felt like a hand squeezing hard the pulsing organ, like it was going to rip it.

 

“My left arm is numb. Is that normal?” he added, with the newly discovered symptom.

 

“You alright?” Nat asked. And of course, he was. He always was. His face was ruined, his brain in tatters and he was probably dying on the spot, but

 

“Always… 36 hours? Jeez.”

 

“We’re seriously understaffed.”

 

Perfect time for Hulk and Thor to be wherever they were. Great timing, such teamwork.

 

“I have an idea.” said Nat. 

 

“Me too. Where’s yours?”

 

“Downstairs. Where’s yours?”

  
  


_ Well, probably finishing his physics homework, flirting with a pretty girl or just lying to everybody and being a superhero, Spider-man. _

  
  


…

 

He questioned everything before he flew back to New York.

 

He thought about what he did. To Wanda, and to Peter.

 

But the truth is that… He was terrified.

 

He cried, in the bathroom earlier. Because he was a mess. Because he was afraid. Because he was fragile and he needed Pepper there, and he was so afraid of losing the only thing he still had that reminded of her.

 

Peter, her walking and talking memory.

 

But Peter never even met her. And Tony couldn’t talk about Pepper while staring at his smile, it was too much for him.

 

He went to his lab as a first stop. An unpredicted stop, but not unecessary. 

 

He pressed a few buttons, turning on something that was more than a simple engine, more than a simple project.

  
  


_ Blinking lights, in red and yellow, pulsing with life, reflecting colors on the image of a broken being, that waited for it, with voracious need.  _

  
  
  


“Hi, Miss Potts.”

 

_ “Hello, Mr. Stark.” _

  
  


…

 

He blinked.

  
  
  


And then, he was knocking at Peter Parker’s door.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second chapter on Civil War, and it is killing me. For real. The feels, the dialogues that I need to check every five seconds, but gosh it's worth it. I hope you enjoy it!


	7. 2016 - III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It literally took me 1000 years to write it (actually, one week and a half) and then even more time to be able to post. But I really loved writing this chapter. It was very very important for me. So yeah! Go read it!

**2016**

 

The good thing about being a teenager superhero is that you still have to go to school, a connection to a standard life you can't avoid. After fighting the bad guys, saving people from car-crashes or falling from scaffolds, coming back home and discovering that your teacher had updated the deadline for a project kept Peter’s feet on the ground.

 

Metaphorically and literally.

 

But, on that day, something different surprised him.

  
  


He opened the door, carrying an old-ass DVD he found, listening to some cool music, thinking about how long it would take for him to work on the DVD and finish his English assignment before leaving to patrol in the night, after all, he had to catch up with all the time he spent with Tony.

 

“Hey May” he murmured, taking off his shoes without bothering to look to his aunt.

 

“Mmm. Hey. How was school today?”

 

“Okay.” he remembered something funny. “There was a car outside, one of those crazy fancy ones that Tony has…”

 

He raised up his head, finally noticing the man himself was there.

  
  


“Oh, hi, Mr. Stark I didn’t know you were here… I didn’t receive your message.” Peter turned off his earphones and walked on his direction.

 

Peter came back home less than 72 hours ago when Tony had to deal with ‘problems Steve ‘caused’. It was a bad time for a curious boy like Peter to walk around with people so secretive, but he couldn’t say anything, could he?

 

“Wanted to make you a surprise.” he smiled. But it was a strange smile.

Peter gulped.

 

“I was talking to your aunt about the whole process of, you know, assuming you as a… Heir, publicly and how it would be annoying for both of you. And our made up internship.”

 

“Yeah.” Peter had no idea where that was going.

 

“I had an idea for you to actually work with me. A proper scholarship that you can put on your CV.”

 

“Oh, yeah, great. I… Sure.”

 

“Can I go check your grades? Not as a bossy guardian like she probably is” Tony pointed to May, a playful smile on his mouth. “Just want to check some things, to make it more valuable, and see where you could fit best.”

 

“We have some conditions, ok?” May alerted. “It can’t affect Peter’s graduation. It is still his main goal and all.”

 

Oh, shit.

 

Yeah, cause Peter wasn't juggling enough babies between school and Spider-man and family. Great.

 

“Don't worry. It's going to be good. Funded it all, so you can save for college.” Tony stopped and took something out of his mouth. “It still tastes awful, May.”

 

“Don't you complain about my walnut date loaf!” she said, laughing soon after.

 

“Ok so… I will just… Change and all." Peter said, quickly going to his room and pulling off his suit, stuffing it on the little trapdoor on his ceiling, the usual hideout, and pulling off his jeans quickly to put on shorts.

 

Tony Stark was knocking on his door.

 

And Peter just… Had that feeling. The same feeling he had when Tony came up to meet him and tell him the truth.

 

But… Somehow, the other way around.

 

He took a deep breath and let Tony in.

  
  


"You know, if I were not already married when I met your aunt, you would probably have a very strange family configuration by now.” Tony said, and Peter could only flinch and say “Gross!”, but smile.

 

He then noticed the huge bruise on Tony’s face, smile dying instantly.

 

“Are you ok? What happened?”

 

The older man touched his face briefly and only said. “I’m fine, I’m fine” and played with Peter’s nearly brought home DVD. “But we need to talk.”

 

“Was it a big fight?” Peter anxiously asked. “I didn’t see on the news…”

 

“Pff. News knows nothing. But, you know what knows? People. People with their smartphones, going around and filming what they see. Like this.”

 

Peter’s stomach dropped.

 

Projected from Tony’s phone, there it was. He, as Spiderman, swinging around, saving people and stopping accidents.

 

He panicked.

 

“W-who is this? A-a new hero?”

 

His mouth was dry, his hands sweating like crazy.

 

“It’s you.” Tony didn’t ask. He just said. Stated, like that.  “Look at you go. Wow! Nice catch. 3,000 pounds, 40 miles an hour. That’s not easy. You got mad skills.”

 

“What? No. Of course not. And, and it's all fake. I mean, can you trust youtube these days? It’s like that video…”

 

“The UFO’s over Phoenix?”

 

“Yeah, exactly!”

 

“No, I… I have my reasons to believe this is true…” and suddenly, Tony was opening his little secret trapdoor.

 

Gosh! Why couldn’t he hide it in a better place?!?

 

Peter tried to hide his suit, but it was there now.

 

The truth served right in front of him.  As he predicted, sort of, before.

 

“When did you discover? I…” Peter started, but couldn’t finish. He felt his eyes get somewhat moist.

 

“A few weeks. A month maybe.”

 

Peter moaned. “Look… Mr. Stark… I was going to tell you… I just…”

 

“What were you thinking? Oh, I know a lot of Superheroes, who care if they have miserable, risky lives? I want to be like them! I’m going to dress a onesie and..”

 

“It’s not an onesie!”

 

“Yes, it is.” Tony grabbed the suit. “What’s with this goggles? Can you even see in these?”

 

“Yes! I do!” Peter pulled the suit from him. “Look, Mr. Stark… I was doing it before you. Before it all. I… It was an accident. I was in an excursion to a lab, and they had these weird spiders and one bit me and then I just… Became this. I was doing it before I even knew… So…”

 

He sighed. Of course Tony would not allow him to do it. 

 

“I can’t believe it happened today. I was… Thinking about telling you eventually. But not today. I was actually having a real good day, you know? Didn’t miss my train, this perfectly good DVD was just sitting there and… Algebra test? Nailed it!”

  
  


“Who else knows? Anybody?”

 

“Nobody.”

 

“I would ask why you didn’t tell May, but it’s pretty obvious.”

 

Peter nodded. 

 

Tony was now sitting on his bed. And he was taking it all very well, despite the apparent scolding.

 

“You know what I think is really cool? Your webbing. That tensile strength is off the charts. Who manufactured that?”

 

“I did.”

 

And Tony smiled.

 

“And the whole climbing walls? Cohesive gloves or…?”

 

“Just me again. A lot changed. My body, my senses… That’s why I need the goggles… It’s like, my senses have been dialed to 11, you know? They… Help me focus.”

 

He let his body fall on the bed by Tony’s side.

 

“I was going to tell you, ok? I really was. I just didn’t know when, or how. And I was afraid this was going to be your reaction. I know you are going to say that I’m too young, that this is risky, and that a lot of bad things can come from being a superhero. God, I know. I keep watching TV, I keep seeing you waking up from nightmares and… And Wanda’s brother is dead, I… I know.”

 

Peter took a deep breath and continued.

 

“But I’ve been me, this… Normal guy, lacking some parts but a standard guy. And then it just… Happened to me. And… After what happened to my uncle I just… I needed to do something. With these powers, with this… Responsibility. When…. When you can do the things that I can, but you don’t… And then the bad things happen… They happen because of you.”

 

Tony sighed. “You can’t be an Avenger…”

 

“No, no, of course not I’m just… Looking out for the little guy… Making the world a better place by… Stopping shoplifters and… Saving kitties from trees, you know?”

 

It was not a lie, but it was not fully the truth. If he could, Peter would do it. He would join the Avengers, he knew he could do great things…

 

But at that moment, he only bit his tongue and tried to believe 100% in his words.

 

“Ok. Great. We need to get you a passport.” Tony stood up.

 

“Wait, what? Why?”

 

“We’re going to Germany.”

 

“Why? What’s happening?” Peter’s eyes were huge. Was he taking him to some sort of unempowering institution? Was he taking him to a superpower specific boarding-school? ‘Cause he certainly didn’t want to…

 

“I need your help. As Spider-Man. Time to prove that you’re worth this whole thing.” Tony said vaguely to Peter and the red and blue suit. 

 

“But I… I have homework…” Peter tried to even argue, but Tony’s face said everything. “Ok, ok, I’ll go I just… I am not dropping out of school because of this, am I?”

 

“Of course not. What kind of irresponsible guardian would I be? The one that lets a teenager go around town dealing with muggers while lying to your official guardian?”

 

Peter freaked out when he alluded Aunt May.

 

It was something rather instinctive, to web Tony’s hand to the door handle he was about to open.

 

“It is still a secret, ok? You can’t tell May. You simply can’t. If you do it, it’s all over.” Peter pointed at himself and then at Tony. “I swear, I won’t ever look at you again in my life, and…”

 

“Oh my God, stop being so dramatic! I won’t. Now, take me out of this.” Tony grunted, stuck.

 

“Sorry, sorry, I’ll get the…”

 

...

 

"So you and Steve...?" Peter asked, and it didn't really surprise Tony that, after everything, he told him, about brainwashed HYDRA assassins and Captain running away with Sam and Bucky.

 

And gosh, how he wished Peter had asked about anything else.

 

"I… I'm going to be honest with you, I don't know. Probably, I mean… It's hard to know. We're in the middle of something bigger than this, so…"

 

"Are you… Are you okay? With this?" Peter asked, looking into Tony's eyes.

 

And Tony wanted to say 'Well, obviously no.' Tony wanted to talk, he wanted to explain how everything now was such chaos that he was cogitating taking a teenager to try to capture highly trained superpowered humans.

 

And it was happening so, so fast.  

 

It had been only two days since Bucky... Someone… Exploded the Vienna International Centre.

 

And now, Steve was gone, Hawkway had taken Wanda to escape and they were running away to Germany to go god knew where.

 

And like it was not enough… There was also his relationship.

 

Tony was stressed to a point he just wanted to take some sleeping medicine to hope he would wake up by Steve’s side, and they would be fine and talk about something that Tony could make a joke about while trying to say something deep.

 

Tony wanted to talk about his father. How would his father deal with their relationship?

 

He usually didn’t think about Howard, and now, dreaming about him felt distressing. Premonitory, even.

 

All Tony wanted was to wake up and hug Steve. And tell him how his father would be ‘torn between being homophobic and forcing me to marry you instantly because you’re Captain America’. And then cry, because his emotional was a mess, and it had been like that for so long that Tony couldn’t even begin to deal with it.

  
  
  


But Tony didn’t wake up with Steve by his side.

 

He was sleeping with his neck bending down in his Quinjet's seat. Near him, Natasha was also asleep, listening to some calming instrumental music, as she used to do sometimes when stress was unbearable.

 

Rhodes was also asleep. Holding a book, snoring.

 

But T'Challa was awake. Eyes focused on the little table in front of him, like he was going to jump on it if it moved. Luckily it didn’t.

 

There was pain in his eyes. A deep amount of pain that Tony almost knew well enough. It was a feeling of loss, of course, but also of anger.

 

Tony didn’t talk to him, because he was probably hosting similar amounts of pain and anger himself. It was better like this.

 

Vision was also awake. And he looked just like a normal human because he also looked  _ moody _ .

  
  


Feeling a bad taste in his mouth by the atmosphere in that flight, Tony got up to get something to chew. While he was grabbing a packet of peanuts, he asked FRIDAY to send him news about Happy and Peter.

  
  


Peter was not coming with them. Firstly because he didn’t want to deal with the judgment of taking a  kid to a battle (even if everyone but T’Chala hoped deep down a fight wouldn’t happen, as unlikely as it was).  He didn’t want to explain about Peter being a superhero.

 

He didn’t want to make Peter see that feeling, of hopelessness on his friends.

  
  


He didn’t want to make Peter notice so soon that his family was breaking apart.

  
  
  


Vision came to talk to him.

 

“I heard you calling FRIDAY. Are you not using P…”

 

“No. I’m not. But it’s working. I checked it yesterday.”

 

“Is it… Accurate?” seeing Vision trying to be polite and gentle, and failing because of technicalities was always funny.

 

“Nice wording. But, yes. Amazingly.” Tony chewed some peanuts. “You did something, didn’t you?”

 

Vision just nodded.

 

“Now I sort of regret it. I analyzed how it could be bad for your mental health.”

 

“Yeah. I figured it. That’s why it’s not with me.”

  
  


“I’m not going with you tomorrow.” Vision said before Tony completed his action of going back to his sit. “If things get too bad, I will intervene, but I don’t agree with the existence of this conflict, and despite your reasons, I don’t think my behavior was the best one regarding Wanda, Mr. Stark.”

 

Oh. That’s why he was like that. He was feeling bad for going against the girl he… Liked? Loved? Whatever that was.

 

He gave Vision a sort-of reassuring shoulder pat, something that felt very unnatural for Tony, but what could he do?

 

“We are going to bring them to reason. Wanda, Sam…”

 

Steve.

 

But Vision said nothing else.

 

And Tony went back to his seating.

  
  
  
  


He didn’t believe in a single word he said.

 

…

 

"They're there." Natasha informed.

 

"Evacuate the airport." Tony ordered. On his phone, Happy's message, 'we're at the airport'. He looked at the little group they gathered. "Alright, suit up. We're doing it."

  
  
  


And there they were.

 

" Wow, it's so weird how you run into people at the airport. Don't you think that's weird?"

 

"Definitely weird." Rhodes went along.

 

"Hear me out, Tony. That doctor, the psychiatrist, he's behind all of this." Steve said, before stopping to recognize T'Challa's presence. "Your Highness."

 

Tsc. He still had time for formalities? Because Tony… Tony had no time at all.

  
  


He felt his heart beating fast, so angry and frustrated he was.

 

_ It used to beat this fast when he was with Steve, but for very different reasons. _

  
  


"Anyway, Ross gave me 36 hours to bring you in. That was 24 hours ago. Can you do this favor for your loving husband?"

 

Every sentence had that bitter taste that made him want to spit. Especially the last word.

  
  


It made the assassin frown.

 

And it was weird because everyone sort of reacted - it was not like Steve and Tony walked around professing their love and relationship - but that expression… That one look that meant something Tony couldn’t discern at the moment… It stuck with him.

 

Steve tried to argue.

 

"Tony, this is not about u… You're after the wrong guy."

 

"Your judgment is askew. Your old buddy killed innocent people yesterday."

 

"And there are five more super soldiers just like him. I can't let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can't."

 

There was determination in Steve’s voice. A man on his mission. He wouldn’t stop.

 

"Steve… you know what's about to happen. Do you really wanna punch your way out of this one?" Natasha asked. But Tony was done with it.

 

"All right, I've run out of patience. Underoos!"

 

And Peter came.

  
  
  


It was a different thing, seeing him there, in front of him, instead of in a video.

  
  
  


The boy was wearing his new suit and moved with an agility Tony never seen before. He shot a web, stole Steve's shield and bound his hands.

 

And they were shocked, but Tony was too.

  
  


"Nice job, kid." he said, as he did once, a long time ago, when Peter was still just a child and they didn't know each other.

  
  


And right there, in the middle of that outburst of bad feelings, there was a good one, a simple, but an authentic one. 

 

Tony felt proud.

  
  
  
  


Peter's babble broke the moment of course.

 

"Thanks. Well, I could've stuck the landing a little better. It's just the new suit… Well, it's nothing, Mr. Stark. It's-It's perfect. Thank you."

 

"Yeah, we don't really need to start a conversation…" Tony said, in the hopeful intent of reminding Peter where they were.

 

"Peter?" Steve frowned. "Is that you?"

 

"W-what? N-no. Of course not. I'm Spider-Man." the boy tried to fake a deep voice, which only made it more obvious.

 

"It's him." Tony gave up. "He's been a superhero for a few months now. What can I say, runs in the family. Can we go back to the part where we stop Steve from ruining it?"

 

"Tony!" Natasha scolded.

 

"Hey, everyone." Peter waved to them.

 

"How can you bring your child to this?" Steve grunted. "You're so irresponsible!"

 

"And you're so idiot. You dragged Clint in. After he retired. You 'rescued' Wanda from a place she doesn't even want to leave, a safe place. I'm trying to keep… I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart!"

 

_ You're tearing our family apart. _

 

"You did that when you signed." Steve said, and it was so clear.

 

_ The Sokovia Accords. A divorce file. The same. _

 

Tony wanted to punch his patriotic face and break his perfect teeth.

 

"Alright, We're done. You're gonna turn Barnes over, you're gonna come with us. NOW! Because it's us… Or a squad of J-SOC guys… With no compunction about being impolite... Come on."

  
  


And Tony look right on Steve’s eyes. On the blue ocean that had a green reef near the middle. And he felt vulnerable because he was desperate, and he needed it all to stop.

  
  
  


But of course, it wouldn’t happen.

  
  
  


The arrow shot started it.

  
  


They had one more in their team now. 

 

“Oh, great. Alright, there's two on the parking deck. One of them's Maximoff, I'm gonna grab her. Rhodey, you want to take Cap?” he flew up, followed closely by his friend, the one that would probably not leave his side as some would.

  
  


“Hey, Mr. Stark, what should I do?” Peter’s voice innocently arose via communicator.

“What we discussed. Keep your distance. Web ‘em up.”

 

He knew they would probably not hurt Peter, but he wouldn’t risk it.

 

“Ok, copy that!”

 

The other’s started fighting. T'Challa against Steve, Natasha against… That shrinking guy.

  
  


And Peter… Where the hell was Peter?

 

…

 

Peter’s veins were pumping with excitement. It was the first time he was in a battle like that. And while he was trying to keep it professional and it had a deep emotional meaning for him (after all, he didn’t like to see his folks fighting against each other), it was hard to not be thrilled about it.

 

He saw Sam running with the Soldier guy, and decided that he probably should stop them. Yeah. His job here. Yeah.

 

He swung and broke the glass wall he was climbing on, basically landing on Sam with a kick.

 

Ugh, he hoped he didn’t hurt him too much…

 

Wait, a punch from the Soldier, he should probably stop that.

 

“You have a metal arm? That is awesome, dude!” Peter said, amazed. But he couldn’t process that information for too long cause Sam was throwing himself against Peter and flying away.

 

“You have the right to remain silent!” said Peter, mostly because he always wanted to say it, before he fended Sam off and swung after him again.

 

…

 

Hovering above the ground, Tony tried to talk to Wanda, and, in the back of his mind, a small portion of him was grateful he had a teenager son with spider-powers and not a young adult daughter with cosmic energy and mind-altering powers.

 

“Wanda, I think you hurt Vision’s feelings.” he made a quick remark, but she was pissed.

 

“You locked me in my room.”

 

“Okay. First, that's an exaggeration. Second, I did it to protect you.” she seemed even angrier. Well.  “Hey, Clint.”

 

“Hey, man.”

 

“Clearly, retirement doesn't suit you. You got tired of shooting golf?”

 

“Well, I played 18, I shot 18. Just can't seem to miss.”

 

And he fired an arrow at Tony, which was quickly stopped by a simple blasting. A miss, ironically. 

 

“First time for everything.”

 

“Made you look.”

 

And suddenly there were cars falling down, and Tony could not simply stop them or explode them before they all came down. Wanda used her powers to pile them on top of Tony.

 

“Multiple contusions detected.” FRIDAY, very handful, alerted.

 

“Yeah, I detected that too.” he groaned in pain. “I still hate telekinetic powers. Ugh.”

  
  


…

 

Peter felt so grateful for the structure in that terminal, cause there were lots of beams we could swing and stop on, and chasing Sam was way easier like that.

 

He was trying to not get distracted at Sam’s backward flying and shooting, which was good because his attention was always needed for escaping… Random airport heavy things that Bucky Barnes threw at him?

 

Well, luckily Cap trained him on launching thing’s back and forth. 

 

“Hey buddy, I think you lost this!” and he threw the thing back at Barnes. He was going to be happy for his line and action, and he did for a millisecond before Sam kicked his back and made him fall off the beam.

 

He quickly webbed himself up to the ceiling and fired another web on Sam’s back, stopping the EXO-7 from working, and sending him right to the floor.

 

Before he could continue running, Peter webbed his wrist to a balcony railing.

 

“Is this stuff coming out of you?” Sam asked, looking at the webs.

 

“No, no. It’s actually a shooter that I wear…” he started showing his wrists but was stopped by a surprised “Peter?” from Sam.

 

Gosh, why couldn’t he have a voice modulator like  _ Manbat _ ?

 

“What the hell are you doing here? Since when…?”

 

“It’s a long story, ok? But basically, I was bitten by a radioactive spider and…”

 

“Ok, ok, stop. I don't know if you've been a fight before but there's usually not this much talking.”

 

Peter’s cheeks got warm under his mask.

 

“Alright, sorry, my bad.”

 

Peter went to swing down, but the Soldier jumped in the way, resulting in Bucky and Sam falling to the lower floor. Peter used this opportunity to web them down.

 

“So, I would love to keep explaining and all but I’m really hoping to impress Tony with my skills today so he can allow me to keep being Spider-Man so, I’m sorry.”

 

And he was about to web himself out of there, but Redwing, Sam’s little drone, dragged him away, through the glass wall.

 

“Wwahhhh! Gosh I should really stop talking during fights”

 

…

 

“Is this part of the plan?” Natasha asked Tony when he helped her get up after a goddamn truck was thrown at them. 

 

“Well, my plan was to go easy on them. You wanna switch it up?”

  
  


Vision showed up, which really meant things were bad.

 

He started speaking, in a righteous tone.

 

“Captain Rogers. I know you believe what you’re doing is right. But for the collective good, you must surrender now.”

 

Tony left Natasha on the floor, and by his side, his allies for that clash arrived. T’Challa as Black Panther, Rhodes with his armor. And even Peter, as Spider-Man, that skillfully landed before standing up, side-by-side with them.

  
  


“This is gonna end well.” stated Natasha, in an obvious irony, before they started striding towards Captain’s team.

 

“They’re not stopping…” Peter said, clearly unsure.

 

But Tony had no doubt in his voice or actions. Not anymore.

 

“Neither are we.”

 

And they all sprinted down before they collided.

 

…

 

Captain America’s shield snapped Peter’s web and he fell, obliged to stop.

 

“Sam was right when he said it could’ve decapitated me.” the boy remembered his first meeting with the Avengers. If you told him back then that this would be happening now, he wouldn’t believe.

 

“Look, kid. There’s a lot going on here that you don’t understand.” said Steve.

 

“Tony said you’d say that… I’m sorry.” 

 

Peter shoot his webs, one sticking to the shield and the other to his ankle. He pulled him, happy inside that he was strong enough for it to happen, and kicked him.

 

That was such a weird circumstance. His brain thought of a meme.

 

_ ‘’Average superhero kicks their own stepfather 3 times a year’ actually just statistical error. Average superhero kicks 0 stepfather's a year. Spider-Man, who’s been in a fight against his stepfather’s friends, that are all superheroes too, is an outlier and should not have been counted.’ _

 

He rolled on the floor and stood up, focusing again - and gosh how he would lose concentration quickly - in time for adding, in a cool-sassy tone. “He also said to go for your legs.”

 

But maybe for that lack of concentration. Or lack of experience. Or maybe because he was  _ Captain America _ , Steve was able to run for his shield, and even when Peter tried to stop him by webbing his hands and pulling him back, he spun and did a somersault in the air, basically tossing Peter away.

  
  
  
  


But Peter was not going to give up.

 

He tried to take the shield out of Steve. It was one of the main things Tony alerted him to do, but it was hard when the guy was literally grabbing his web and pulling him. 

 

Said shield came down across his face, and FUCK that hurt. Sorry, May. Not sorry Steve.

 

He got up on a gangway and heard Steve.

 

“Stark tell you anything else?”

 

So he was Stark now, huh?

 

“That you just don’t accept that you can be horribly wrong and this can put people in danger.”

 

Peter tried to swing down, but Steve did a freaking leap to kick him backward. His back hit the metal surface of the jet way’s leg.

 

“Guess he had a point. But it still applies to him too. And, Peter, I’m sorry too.” 

 

And suddenly, the bridge was falling on top of Peter’s head. But he held it up.

 

And, dude, that was heavy.

 

“You’re good at this. Being a hero. Don’t stop if your father tells you so. You gotta do the right thing.” 

 

“Yeah, I know.”

 

“Hope I see you soon, Peter. And stay in school.”

 

Steve left.

  
  


Ok, could anyone help him out of that thing already?

 

…

 

The Thumbelina guy was inside his suit, deactivating his things. And yeah, they got Black Panther by pure luck and Peter was a hero because of probabilities but where the heck they got that guy from?

 

“FRIDAY?”

 

“ _ Deploying fire suppression system. _ ”

  
  
  


It would be fine if Thumbelina guy didn’t decide he wanted to feature in the ‘Attack of the 50 Foot Woman’ movie as her older and taller brother, grabbing Rhodes leg.

 

“Give me back my Rhodey.” Tony said, but before he could do anything, Sam kicked him.

 

It was about the same time the BUG (Big Unfriendly Giant) let go of Rhodes, that went spinning in the air until Peter caught him with a web.

 

The fight continued, Sam still attacking him directly while the others basically tried to defend themselves from the attacks of once-small-now-huge guy, that involved a kicking a bus on Black Panther and Vision and throwing the wing of a fucking plane at Tony.

 

“Okay, anybody on our side hiding any shocking and fantastic abilities they’d like to disclose? I’m open to suggestion.”

 

Ah, oh, nice, Falcon’s drone cracked against his helmet. Wonderful.

 

Up to the giant’s body, War Machine and Spider-Man were doing their bests. Wanda started throwing cars at Rhodes and Peter was climbing on the giant-man mask.

 

Then Vision started acting, and War Machine flew, trying to stop Wanda from helping Steve and Bucky to escape.

 

Peter, that was running on the top of a plane, trying to escape the giant’s hands, said: “Hey guys, do you know that really old movie,  _ Empire Strikes Back _ ?”

 

“Oh my god, what  a great way to rub my age into my face.” Rhodes complained.

 

The boy was swinging around the giant, still explaining his idea. “You that part… Where they’re on the snow planet… With the walking thingies?” he wrapped himself onto the huge legs of the once-tiny man.

 

“Maybe the kid’s on to something.” Tony got interested.

 

“High now, Tony, go high!” Rhodes led.

 

So he followed. And they punched the guy.

 

He could listen to Peter’s exciting celebration while the man started falling, but he was sent flying down after one of the ginormous limb hit the boy.

 

And for a second, for a millisecond, Tony didn’t really care, until he considered how high the boy had fallen from, and how he wasn’t moving on the ground.

 

He felt like his heart had stopped.

  
  


_ Maybe it was a bad idea. A terrible idea. Oh my god, what was he thinking… Peter is just a kid… If he’s hurt… If he’s… _

 

In a blink, he was standing by the kid’s side, helmet off, hands immediately trying to help, breath shook.

 

“P-peter?”

 

The boy moved, grabbing his hands, scarred “Get off me!”

 

“Hey, hey, it’s me. Tony, your irresponsible guardian, hey.”  Tony kept holding the boy’s hands while he calmed down.

 

He wanted to cry, so relieved he was. 

 

“Hey Tony.” the boy gave a tired smile. “I’m sorry that… That was scary.”

 

“Yeah, yeah. You’re done. Alright?” he obviously wouldn’t let the boy keep fighting. The boy looked exhausted and Tony couldn’t handle another heart gymnastic like that. 

 

“What?”

 

“You did a good job kid. Now stay down.”

 

“No,  I’m good, I’m fine…” of course he wouldn’t accept it that easily.

  
  


_ “He is a Stark, isn’t he?” she asked. _

  
  


“Stay down.”

 

“No, it’s good, I gotta get him back!”

 

“You’re going home or I’ll call Aunt May! You’re done!” he said, more serious but in no way more severe. Just the right amount of incisiveness needed.

  
  


_ “He is. But luckily I am one too, so I know how to deal with him.” _

  
  


“Wait, Mr. Stark, wait! I’m not done… I’m not…” the boy laid down again. “Okay, I’m done. I’m done.”

  
  


_ “He is lucky to have you.” she said, truthfully. And Tony wanted to believe in it. But he thought about his father, and only nodded negatively. _

 

…

 

Steve and Bucky got to the Quinjet. 

 

And Tony couldn’t give up. Even if it was improbable for them to stop the plane by now, he would still try.

 

Rhodes was by his side and Sam was following them.

  
  


War Machine asked Vision for help on getting rid of the Falcon.

 

And he did.

 

But he missed.

  
  


How can a robot miss?

  
  


“Rhodey!”

  
  


Rhodes was falling down and Tony tried to catch him. Even Sam. Oh god, they needed to stop him.

 

“Tony… I’m flying dead stick” he said. There was black smoke coming out of his armor.

  
  


“RHODES”

  
  


He fell on the ground, creating a crater behind him.

  
  


Tony, shaking, pulled off his faceplate.

  
  


His eyes were closed and there was blood on his face.

  
  


Tony’s heart was back to awfully aching, his lungs barely could work.

 

“Read vitals” he interrupted FRIDAY mid-sentence, as she was about to question Tony about his own health.

 

“Heartbeat detected.” she said. “Emergency medical is on its way.”

 

Tony wanted to cry. Of relieve, maybe, but also of despair. He didn’t know how serious the fall had affected him, and since Happy, he wasn’t keen on having a friend in a situation like that.

 

“I’m sorry.” Sam’s voice got his attention, but Tony only blasted him to the ground, cause he didn’t want to listen about any of that anymore.

 

Let Steve and Bucky run away to hell if they wanted because at the moment he could only care about his wounded best-friend.

 

…

 

“How did this happen?” Tony whispered to Vision. They were silently watching Rhodes have a CT scan.

 

“I became distracted.” the android confessed.

 

“I didn’t think it was possible.”

 

“Neither did I”

 

Vision looked guilty, and Tony absorbed the information.

 

He thought about Wanda, how they were together before it all happened. 

 

And he was angry. Angry because of that stupid conflict that wouldn’t happen if Steve could listen to him at least once.

  
  


He needed a break.

 

He called Peter.

 

“Hey kid, back at the hotel?”

 

“Yeah. Happy bought me some cheeseburgers, but man, the American ones are way better.” Peter giggled but stopped soon after, his tone becoming more serious. “Is Rhodes better?”

 

“He is having a scan right now, but he is stable.” Tony massaged his temples.

 

“Am I going to meet you before returning? It’s okay if you can’t…”

 

“I don’t know. But I’ll message you as soon as I know anything. ‘Till it happens… Go have fun. Ask Happy to take you to SAXRACING, do you like Kart Tracks?”

 

“Never been to one. It’s going to be a nice experience.”

 

“It sure will. Take care, I will talk to you when I can.”

 

“Uhuh. Oh, and, don’t forget to call me if you need backup. You know. As Spider-Man. The reason I came here for.”

 

Tony suppressed a sigh. “Uhuh, yeah, I will contact you if I need you. Now, I need to go. Bye bye, Peter.”

 

“Bye Mr. Stark. Send my get-well-soon wishes to Rhodes, ok?”

 

“Ok, bye kid.”

  
  
  
  


Later, Tony received the results and now was *telling them to Natasha.

 

"The doctors say he shattered L4 through S1. Extreme laceration in the spinal cord. Probably looking at some form of paralysis."

 

"Steve's not gonna stop. If you don't either, Rhodey's gonna be the best case scenario."

 

How dare she?

 

"You let them go, Nat." he reminded her about something that would make him so so angry if he weren't so worried about Rhodes. Was making him angry now.

 

"We played this wrong."

  
  


"'We'? Boy, it must be hard to shake the whole double agent thing, huh? It sticks in the DNA." he was bitter.

 

"Are you incapable of letting go of your ego for one goddamn second?"

 

"T'Challa told Ross what you did, so… they're coming for you."

 

It was another thing that was frustrating Tony so much. Why couldn't people understand that he was worried about their future?

 

Couldn't she see that they needed to stop them, and in the future, he was probably going to be forced to go after her? And Steve?

 

"I'm not the one that needs to watch their back."

 

She left.

 

...

 

Tony was looking at holographic images from the Berlin Police. Surveillance images.

 

" _ The Task Force called for a psychiatrist as soon as Barnes was captured. The UN dispatched Dr. Theo Broussard from Geneva within the hour. He was met by this man. _ " FRIDAY had informed before she started running facial recognition.

 

She got the verdict.

 

"The fake doctor is actually Colonel Helmut Zemo, Sokovian Intelligence." Tony projected the image. "Zemo ran Echo Skorpion, a Sokovian covert kill squad."

 

"So, what happened to the real Broussard?" Tony asked.

 

"He was found dead in a Berlin hotel room. Where police also found a wig and facial prosthesis approximating the appearance of one James Buchanan Barnes."

 

Tony felt like an idiot.

  
  


"Son of a bitch. Get this to Ross."

 

" _ Yes, Boss. _ "

  
  
  


They were all taken to prison.

 

And god, Tony wanted to feel guilty, but he couldn’t right now.

 

He needed to be a hero like Steve, that brilliant idiot, was.

  
  


Tony was a wreck by that point. His arm was in a sling, painfully relocated a few hours earlier, his face had purple spots and even underneath his expensive clothes, there were bruises and even a fragmented rib. But he had taken a bunch of painkillers, so it would be fine.

 

He walked up to Ross.

 

“So? You got the files. Let’s reroute the satellites, start facial scanning this Zemo guy.”

 

“You seriously think I’m gonna listen to you after that fiasco in Leipzig? You’re lucky you’re not in one of these cells.”

 

Tony’s head ached again.

 

Yeah, there were no amount of painkillers that could stop this mess from being less awful.

  
  
  


They got to an operating room.

 

On a surveillance screen, he could see Wanda, all curled up, wearing a straightjacket.

 

_ “She’s a kid!” _ Steve’s voice resonated on his mind. He could see it right now. She was just a kid. She was scared and angry, and sad.

  
  


The monitor flickered. He blinked.

  
  


The security doors were open. Around him, in a chamber, there were widows. To prison cells.

  
  


Clint started clapping.

 

“The Futurist, gentleman! The Futurist is here! He sees all. He knows what’s best for you, whether you like it or not.”

 

“Give me a break, Barton. I had no idea they’ll put you here come on.”

 

The imprisoned man spat.

 

“Yeah. Well, you know they’d put us somewhere, Tony.”

 

“Yeah, but not some super-max floating ocean pokey. You know, this place is for maniacs. This is a place for…”

 

“Criminals?” Clint stood up. “Criminals, Tony. Think that’s the word you’re looking for.”

 

He looked right into Tony’s eyes through the metal bars. “Right? That didn’t use to mean us. Or Sam, or Wanda. But here we are.”

 

“Because you broke the law.”

 

“Yeah”

 

“I didn’t make you.”

 

“La, la, la, la, la…”

 

Tony wanted to be angry. Tony wanted to be angry, but he also knew he couldn’t. 

 

It just made him feel more pain.

 

“You read it, you broke it.”

 

“La, la, la, la, la…”

 

Fuck, Barton. 

 

“Alright, you’re all grown up. You got a wife and kids. I don’t understand why didn’t you think about them before you chose the wrong side?”

 

“Why didn’t you think about your husband and son before turning your back on your family?” Clint glowered when Tony started to walk away. “You gotta watch your back with this guys. There is a change you gonna break it.”

  
  


“Hank Pym always said, you never can trust a Stark.” said some rando.

 

“Who are you?”

 

“Come on, man.”

  
  


The rando was apparently offended. 

  
  


He saw Sam. Facing the back of the cell.

 

“How’s Rhodes?” he asked.

 

“They’re flying him to the Columbia Medical tomorrow. So… Fingers cross.”

 

Tony left a tired sigh out. A worried, tired sigh.

 

“What you need? They fed you yet?” Tony asked.

 

The man raised an eyebrow. “You’re the good cop now?”

 

“I’m just the guy who needs to know where Steve went.”

  
  


He needed it. Desperately. To save his family, the one that Clint so easily rubbed on his face. To save his sinking marriage.

 

To save Steve.

  
  


Sam couldn’t see it, obviously. He started walking closer.

 

“Well, you better go get a bad cop, because you’re gonna have to go Mark Fuhrman on my ass to get information out of me.”

 

Tony only need a few touches on his  _ Very SmartWatch _ .

 

“Oh, I just knocked the ‘A’ out of their ‘AV’. We got about 30 seconds before they realize it’s not their equipment.”

 

He showed a holographic image of Doctor Broussard. “Just look. Because that is the fellow who was supposed to interrogate Barnes.”

 

Tony took a little pause “Clearly, I made a mistake, Sam, I was wrong.”

  
  


It fell so… Heavy to say that. But also like a weight leaving his shoulders.

 

“That’s a first.” Sam said, still wary.

 

“Cap is definitely off the reservation, but he is about to need all the help he can get. We didn’t know each other very well. You don’t have to…”

 

“Hey, it’s alright.” Tony came a bit closer to the window. Sam sighed, and despite still looking uneasy, said.

 

“Look, I’ll tell you… But you have to go alone and as a friend.

 

“Easy.”

  
  


When he was leaving, he met Ross, who asked.

 

“Stark? Did he give you anything on Rogers?”

 

“Nope. Told me to go to hell. I’m going back to the compound instead, but you can call me anytime. I’ll put you on hold, I like to watch the line blink.”

 

He smiled to Ross unamused face, and for a split second, almost felt like he was his old, bold self.

  
  


It vanished quickly. He thought about Clint, he thought about family.

 

He unclipped the sling holding his left arm, and with a sigh, because oh god, how he wanted an enhanced curative factor, Tony pressed a button, activating his Iron Man suit, that wrapped him up. He flew out of the chopper by an open hatch, being engulfed by the dark clouds, and followed the way to help his Steve. And prevent a world crisis.

 

The usual.

 

…

 

Tony arrived on the bunker slightly after Steve and Bucky did. Not too long, apparently.

 

He surprised the duo, Bucky was pointing his gun to him, and Steve was covering their bodies with his shield. His expression changed when he saw the Iron Man, but not much.

 

He was still a threat, even if not the type of threat that would kill them.

 

Still, Steve got down the stairs they were up to while Tony walked closer, faceplate already off.

 

Bucky just stayed there, protective eyes glued onto Steve.

 

“You seem a little defensive.” Tony said. His husband was still guarding himself with his vibranium buckler.

 

“It’s been a long day.” Steve replied.

 

Tony could feel the aim of Barnes on his head, and even more, his expression, the same enigmatic look that made Tony so uneasy, even if he didn’t know why.

 

“At ease Soldier, I’m not currently after you.” he explained. Maybe that was the reason. Maybe he didn’t want to join his teammates on that shitty floating lockup.

 

“Then why are you here?” Steve was basically speaking between his teeth. Again, shield up against himself. He had his reasons. He couldn’t simply trust Tony out of the blue.

 

Even if they were married. 

 

“Could be your story’s not so crazy. Maybe. Ross has no idea I’m here. I’d like to keep it that way. Otherwise, I gotta arrest myself.” Tony leaned on a pillar.

 

“Well, that sounds like a lot of paperwork.” Steve lowered his shield. His expression was still serious, but he had a positive emotion on his voice. “It’s good to see you, Tony.”

 

“You too cap.”

 

Tony couldn’t stop thinking about how it all happened before. Sometimes, especially after a big threat or fight, he could remember it clearly in 2015 after Ultron, they needed to recover.

 

They would be exhausted, physically and emotionally, and if they kept talking to each other, it would only end up in hour-long arguments. 

 

But it would end, eventually. They would kiss, and hug, and say the sorrys that were needed.

 

On that moment, Tony could listen to how tired Steve was. And he was too.

 

And he just wished it all ended so they could… Go back home?

 

Recover?

 

His mind also went way back, to the night of the Battle of New York. They had just met, but he still invited them all to sleep on the Stark tower.

 

They found places to sleep. Thor -  _ oh how Tony missed his weird sense of humor and weird Asgardian habits _ \- entitled himself to the guest room. Banner -  _ oh how Tony missed his intelligence and friendship _ \- walked to the sofa and lay there, falling asleep immediately. Nat came to cover him up with a blanket. 

 

Barton had to make a phone call. One that took hours and he came back with red bloated eyes. Nobody understood at the time, or nobody cared. Now, Tony could imagine that he was phoning his wife. Explaining his disappearance maybe. 

 

And Steve and Tony sat down, looking at New York outside, drinking mugs of hot cocoa that Nat had earlier forced them to accept. 

 

“Everything changed today.” Steve murmured. “And it is coming from me.”

 

Tony drank a bit more of his mug. “Yeah.”

 

“Do you believe we can work as a team, Tony? From now on?”

 

And Tony looked at him, and for the first time, he could see him clearly. Not anymore as a symbol, or a teammate he was forced to deal with. But as a human. A friend.

 

Something else, maybe?

 

The stars were shining, reflecting on his eyes, and while Tony was too scared to even glance at the sky again, he was not afraid of looking into Steve’s eyes.

 

“I do. We managed to fund a good crew.”

 

But it was more than that. Right now, with that group of super, skillful, courageous people, made him feel at home, like never before.

  
  


Tony’s flashbacks were broken by the ice-cold look that Barnes kept giving him, gun still aiming his head. 

 

“Hey, Manchurian Candidate, you’re killing me. There’s a truce here. You can drop…”

 

Of course, in the second Steve signed to him, he lowered his weapon. 

 

“We can’t waste time.” Bucky said. “Let’s go.”

  
  


They let Tony lead. Of course, it was a strategy. His body was completely covered by metal and he could blast enemies away, while Steve and Bucky, well, they were a couple of gun shooting and shield wielding.

 

_ Couple. Perfect match. _

 

Tony tried to keep his focus. It was not time to… Be jealous.

 

“I got heat signatures.” he informed.

 

“How many?” Steve asked.

 

“Uh… One.”

  
  


They entered a chamber, and lights came on. There was mist coming from inside the capsules.

 

A voice started to come out of a speaker, somewhere.

 

“If it’s any comfort, they died in their sleep.”

 

They could see it now.

 

All of the super soldiers had a clear mark of shooting in the head.

 

“Did you really think I wanted more of you?” the speaker's voice continued. “I’m grateful to them, though. They brought you here.”

 

A light was turned on, and a face could be seen. A man, Zemo, appeared inside of a control room. Tony prepared his blaster, Steve hurled his shield. It only hit the glass and bounced back.

 

“Please, Captain. The Soviets built this chamber to withstand the launch blast of UR-100 rockets.”

 

“I’m betting I could beat that.” Tony defied.

 

“Oh, I’m sure you could, Mr. Stark. Given time. But then you’d never know why you came.”

 

“You killed innocent people in Vienna just to bring us here?” Steve started, coming closer and closer to where Zemo was.

 

“I thought about nothing else for over a year. I studied you. I followed you. But now that you’re standing here, I just realized… There’s a bit of green in the blue of your eyes. How nice to find a flaw.”

 

It made something inside Tony curl. The tone of that man, as if he knew so much. As if he knew more than Tony did.

 

He was spying on Steve. That probably meant he knew a lot about Tony too. About Peter, even.

 

Tony stomach felt cold.

 

But Steve, he kept stern. 

 

“You’re Sokovian. Is that what this is about?”

 

Zemo shook his head negatively. “Sokovia was a failed state long before you blew it to hell. No. I’m here because I made a promise.”

 

“You lost someone?”

 

The man’s tone changed completely, and he said

 

“I lost everyone. And so will you.”

 

Zemo pressed a few buttons. 

 

16 декабря 1991 was seen on a screen.

 

He said “An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumbles from within? That’s dead… Forever.”

 

Tony took off his mask and walked up to the transmission. A freeze frame, a secluded road, and the date, December 16, 1991.

  
  


“I know that road.” Tony asked, louder, to Zemo. “What is this?”

 

His chest was rising up and down with anxiety. He tried to stay calm and watch the screen.

 

A car crash. A motorcycle and then a car crash.  _ The car crash _ .

 

A man got out of the motorbike. He walked up to the driver, another man, on the ground. No, not another man…

 

His…

 

_ “Howard!”  _ his mother voice in the video call.

 

Tony looked at Bucky, cause realization was falling on his head now, fast, brutal. Like that man was, while killing his father.

  
  


He closed his eyes for a second as if he was paying respects for his father. A man that was never a good, honored man or a doting father, but god he deserved more than  _ that _ . 

 

Bucky put him back on the car as if nothing had happened. He drew a circle around the car, walking to his mother, on the passenger.

 

And just like that, she was gone.

 

Bucky pointed his gun to the camera. 

 

And it was the sight of those eyes that broke his trance.

 

…

 

Steve stopped him.

 

“No, Tony.” his voice, despite nervousness, was firm. He was protecting  _ him _ . Of course, he was.

 

It all started to take shape. And it hurt. It hurt so much because it was obvious.

 

He was looking at Steve and his blue-green eyes. He was looking at him and seeing the same thing he saw for the first time in 2014 when Steve went in that mission. 

 

And what he was hiding was now obvious. Clear as the tears that were glistening Tony’s eyes when he asked. “Did you know?”

 

“I didn’t know it was him.”

But the lie fell flat. He couldn’t lie to Tony. Not anymore, at least.

 

Oh, but Tony wanted to hear the truth. The confession. He needed it. His eyes were red and his hands were shaking with anger, he could barely speak.

 

“Don’t bullshit me, Rogers! Did you know?”

  
  


And Steve gave up.

 

“Yes.”

  
  


Tony tried to think about it in a rational way. Because it was his specialty. To think. But he could only manage to do it for 3 seconds before he hit the obvious wall of grief and anger and desire to revenge. At the moment his helmet covered up his face, he punched Steve to the floor and shot Bucky’s gun, right before grabbing the assassin and flying with him across the chamber.

 

And Tony never felt like this, in his whole life. It was more than defeating someone, or killing someone because he needed to save people. 

 

It was personal. Deeply, heavily personal. That man killed his parents, and he couldn’t live with it.

  
  


Steve kept helping Barnes. By throwing his shield, by actually running to face Tony, pushing him away with his vibranium defense. But Tony wouldn’t stop.

 

Just like Steve, previously on that same day, wouldn’t.

  
  


There was a moment between the fight and the collapsing of the tower structures of the bunk where Steve tried to talk. Straight after helping Bucky to run away from Tony, of course.

 

“It wasn’t him, Tony. Hydra had control of his mind.”

 

But Tony was done.

 

“Move!” he ordered, before flying away while Steve tried to stop him, again.

 

“It wasn’t him!”

  
  


Steve tried to break his feet propeller, by grabbing his ankle. He could escape, but now his flying system was compromised.

 

But he was not finished yet. Bucky was still jumping, trying to run away. Steve kept trying to stop him, and Tony could suffer from all the mental distress that was to fight so fiercely against someone he loved after it all was over.

 

He was a man in a mission. He  **wouldn’t** stop.

  
  


He grabbed Barnes neck from behind after he tried to hit him with an iron pipe. The soldier was, if not before, desperate.

 

“Do you even remember then?” Tony asked, hate and grief still making him shake.

“I remember all of them.”

  
  


Bucky pushed them off of the walkway they were previously in, high up, next to the exit of the bunker. While they were falling, Steve jumped into them, and while Barnes was caught up on a platform, Tony and Steve hit the concrete floor.

 

It would be symbolic if Tony cared about it.

  
  


Tony looked down to Steve, that had stood up again.

 

“This isn’t gonna change what happened.”

 

“I don’t care. He killed my mom.”

 

He flew up to Steve and punched him.

 

_ He didn’t care. He didn’t care at all. And he was exhausted. And he was hurt. And he was grieving again, after so many years. _

 

He did it again, and escaped the blonde’s failed attempt of a sleeper hold, managing to pine him down. 

 

_ And right now, he couldn’t see his husband. The man he swore to love, years ago, in a starry night. Those eyes didn’t evoke him hope or caring anymore. Only anger. Only hate. _

 

_ He slept, with that man. _

 

Even if he would deflect from the punches sometimes, most of the time, it was pure metal against his perfect stupid face.

 

_ That traitor. That liar. Keeping a secret that wasn’t even his, to begin with. To protect...  _

 

**_Him._ **

 

A vibranium shield hit Tony’s back and he fell off of Steve. And now he was fighting them two.

 

_ They work so well together. A team, with matched movements.  _

 

_ A duo. A pair.  _

 

_ A… Couple.  _

 

He zapped Steve, throwing him back into a wall. And then it was only him and Bucky. Like it should have been.

 

He tried to end him with an energy beam, but the soldier managed to detract it away, to the ceiling.

 

Barnes pushed him against the opposite wall and started to claw on Tony’s chest, fingers trying to grab his arc reactor out.

 

_ Symbolic, isn’t it? _

 

_ Titanium fingers, ripping off his chest… _

 

Fuck, he had no time for metaphors.

 

Tony blasted him off, blowing away the metal arm. He zapped the man down, and Steve rushed into him, shield up.

  
  


Take that fucking metaphor, then.

 

How at that moment, it wasn’t even Iron against vibranium. The normal man in the armor with guns against the superhuman with just a shield. At that moment, it was just fire. It was just light. Burning, unstoppable fire.

  
  
  
  


He kept seeing his face. With every punch he referred against him, he saw him. Tony could finally match Steve after FRIDAY ran an analysis. 

 

He blocked his punches, he made him fall to his knees. He was right there, right in front of Bucky, still laying on the ground, hounded.

 

And Steve just looked at him. There was blood on his face, and tears running under his helmet.

 

“I’m sorry.” he said. “I can’t… I… I love him.”

 

He…

 

“I love him.” Steve repeated. “I…”

 

And Tony was crying. Because how else could he react?

 

With… Violence?

  
  


“And I loved you.”

  
  
  


He punched you down and threw him away while trying to clear up his vision. He couldn’t hide the feelings from his own voice, broken. “Stay down.”

 

But Steve, Steve was the same stubborn, persistent man he fell in love with. And that hurt Tony the most.

 

“I can do this all day.” Steve said, eyes equally wet, voice choking, but standing. Despite the blood on his face or his bare ability to keep standing. He was still there.

 

And Tony was about to blast him if it weren’t for Barnes.

 

_ Maybe it was for the best. _

 

Tony kicked him the face, and it was all the distraction Steve needed to grab him and throw him down, punching him ‘till his mask was off.

 

Steve held the shield up, and for a second, Tony thought he was gone. Steve would cut off his head with the armor Howard Stark made, to defend the man who killed him. 

 

But he just finished the work of Barnes, breaking his suit’s core. 

 

And now Tony could care about symbolism because Steve was looking right into his eyes while he did it.

 

The shield was stuck there while Steve fought to stand up. It was over now.

 

And Tony was left there, on the ground. It was too much.

 

It all happened in two days. The beginning of the end lasted a month. The proper end, two days.

 

Steve retrieved the shield from Tony’s broken armor. He helped Bucky up, and the look they shared... That look…

 

“That shield doesn't belong to you.” Tony said, in desperate, last words to the man leaving. “You don’t deserve it. My father made that shield!”

 

And Steve stopped.

  
  


The shield fell flat on the floor, and the man who once was Captain America, who once was his ally, friend and husband, left, carrying Bucky around his shoulder.

  
  
  


Tony blinked and they were gone. And he blinked again, and again, eyes burning with his tears, everything aching.

 

He was alone now. 

 

And the only thing he could see was the faint light glowing on the chest of his own metal coffin.

 

…

  
  
  
  


But life goes on.

 

Rhodes was starting to progress with the leg braces Tony created, starting to walk again. 

 

“Uh, Mr. Stark? There is a FedEx Driver down there. But, well, he called you… Tony Stank.” Peter’s laughing face was seen between the door and the wall.

 

“Tony Stank? Oh my god. I’m never dropping that. Table for one, Mr. ‘Stank’. Please, by the bathroom.”

 

“I hate you two.” Tony walked out of the room, followed by Peter. “And you, go get your stuff. I’m driving you home after dinner.”

 

The boy nodded. “Copied.”

Tony picked the package from the… Weirdly familiar FedEx man.

 

…

 

_ “Tony, I’m glad you’re back at the compound. I never liked the idea of you being alone in a mansion by yourself when I was away. Another reason why I encouraged Peter to stay with you when possible. _

_ I hope Peter is okay. He is a great kid, with a good heart, and he is a hero. I like to believe he got it after you. _

_ Tony, we all need family. And The Avengers… Peter… They are yours. Maybe more so than mine. You know well that I’ve been on my own since I was 18, and I never fit anywhere. Even in the army. Even… With you. _

_ And I know I hurt you, Tony. And it hurts me to know that. What we lived was very real until the very end, and so are it’s reasons. _

_ I never cheated on you. In the biblical way, I mean. In this instance, if it makes you feel any better, I never failed you on. _

_ But I lied. I hid things from you. And I  guess I thought by not telling you about your parents I was sparing you, but I can see now that I was really sparing myself. And I’m sorry. _

_ Hopefully one day you can understand. I wish we agreed on the Accords, I really do. I wish… Things with Bucky were different. _

_ And I know you’re doing what you believe in, and that’s all any of us can do. Live our lives the way we chose to. _

_ That’s all any of us should...” _

 

Tony was interrupted by a call from Ross. A breach at the Raft prison. He managed to hold the call.

 

_ “...No matter what. I promise you, if you need us, if you need me, I’ll be there.” _

 

There was a phone. And a half-filled in divorce file.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


…

 

Peter also received a letter, but he kept it with him. 

 

He didn’t know how Steve knew he would be the one the get it at the Avengers Facility, but, hey, who was him to question it?

 

He sat back on his bed and opened the dark blue envelope that covered it.

 

_ “Hey Queens, how you’re doing? _

_ I hope I didn’t hurt you too badly. It was your first fight, and you did it amazingly. Congratulations. _

_ By the time you’re reading this, I suppose we’re already runaways, so I probably won’t be able to talk to you with frequency. And I can’t really tell you where I am right now, but I can say that you would like it very much. _

_ Everyone is ok and is sending their best regards to you. Even Sam. _

_ I want to tell you beforehand because I don’t really think your father is going to tell you this… You know how he is. _

_ We’re divorcing. And, gosh, I can’t imagine how it can be to go through that like this, even though I like to think you’re an independent strong young man that does not depend on the advice of 100-year-old guys. _

_ I love you Peter, and always will. _

_ Someday, I hope, we will meet again, in a better situation. _

_ ‘Till then, stay in school and take care of your dad. He loves you more than anything in this world. _

_ Good luck, Spider-Man.” _

 

“Why are you crying?” May asked, by hearing his sniffles, while she entered the room. He was barely able to hide the letter.

 

“It’s just… Just the bruise! It’s hurting so much.” he made an agony expression.

 

“That’s what happens when you get into fights, Peter. Just because you have all of that testosterone running into your body doesn’t mean…” she walked out again, coming back soon after with a cold towel she gave to him. 

 

“Oh, no, please, stop, I swear I didn’t… It was just this… Bully from Brooklyn.” he lied and pressed the cold surface against his face. “It was just him and his huge friend. You should’ve seen in May, he was like huge. Huge.”

 

“Okay, tough guy.” she smiles and left the room, slamming the door.

 

Peter stood up and hid the letter in a little box with green chicks’ pattern. It wasn’t purposefully, but he won it in a fun fair and kept and… Well, he shouldn’t be explaining himself to no one.

 

Besides the box, there was a wristband Tony gave him before leaving.

 

He gave a small smile and started fumbling with the uncomfortable item.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what about it? Please tell me your thoughts on the reviews because I really worked hard for this one and I'm super proud.  
> Oh, btw, pride month ayy? Dan Howell came out, gotta write some phanfics soon. Look on my profile if you're interested.  
> It was also my birthday this 17th, so if you wanna leave a comment as a birthday present, I will be very happy uwu  
> ANYWAY, hope you enjoyed it! I will try to bring the next chapter on the 1st of July, so stay tuned.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment if you liked it! And give kudos if you want! Your support is highly appreciated!
> 
> Follow me on twitter I guess? @olivethehobbit
> 
> Oh! And I made a playlist with jams that I listen while writing. Here it is, if you're interested: https://open.spotify.com/user/2b20iaduwncblkiivklg86jtp/playlist/7AEgGw6n66I2cIxbhSuyNP
> 
> And, that's it! Kisses <3


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